


The Heart That Truly Loves Never Forgets

by Saltandburnboys



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Amnesia, M/M, Torture, Violence, Werewolves, alpha!Jared, bottom!Jensen, non-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-10
Updated: 2012-12-10
Packaged: 2017-11-20 19:02:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 23
Words: 33,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/588635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saltandburnboys/pseuds/Saltandburnboys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jensen had no memory of his life before the accident.  His husband, Jeff, had helped him the best he could but the memories just wouldn’t come and no matter what Jensen did, he always felt like something was missing, he just didn’t know what that something was.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Clearly this is an AU story; werewolves do not exist and I’m pretty sure that I’ve played fast and loose with the symptoms of amnesia but I’ll call it fan-fiction licence and leave it at that. I do not own any of the actors in this story, especially not Jared or Jensen, they all belong to themselves. Jared and Jensen are not in a relationship, have never been and have no desire to be in a relationship; they are both happily married and not to each other which is awesome for both of them. Jeffrey Dean Morgan is not the asshole that I make him in this story; I’m sure he is awesome in real life. No money was made from this story. This is a COMPLETED STORY. 
> 
> Rating : R 
> 
> Pairings: Jared/Jensen, Jeff/Jensen.
> 
> Word Count: Around 30,000 words in total, 1.174 for this chapter.
> 
> Warnings: Non-con, dub-con, amnesia, male/male sexual relations (explicit
> 
> ), violence, swearing, adult situations, domestic violence, D/s scenes, age change - Jared and Jensen are the same age in this story, size difference, severe angst for Jensen, gore, horror, bottom!Jensen, knotting, mpreg. 
> 
> Author’s note: Based very, very loosely on a prompt from spnkink-meme.livejournal.com:
> 
>  
> 
> Jared is an alpha who struggles to accept his mate is dead. Jensen just disappeared one day and it’s been years since anyone has heard from him, everyone else has accepted that Jensen is gone. 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Jen doesn’t remember anything before the accident and he wonders sometimes if anyone is out there still looking for him. But he doesn’t have time to waste on it, he’s got pups to looks after. Up to anon if Jared knew that Jensen was pregnant when he disappeared or not. Happy ending please.
> 
> I wrote this ages ago but I only just realised that I hadn't posted it here! Lol!

** The Heart That Truly Loves Never Forgets. **

 

** Chapter One.  **

 

Jensen quickly turned off the alarm at the side of the bed, hoping that it hadn't woken his husband. He gently climbed out from under the covers and padded over to the bathroom to start his day.

 

Jensen looked up into the mirror, cringing a little at the dark shadow across his cheek.  He wondered whether it was really as noticeable as it seemed to be to him or whether it was just because he knew how it had gotten there that made it really stand out.  Jensen hoped that no-one at work asked about it; he hated lying to them, they were good people, but there was no way that he could tell anyone how he'd actually gotten it.

 

It had been his own damn fault anyway, he'd slipped up and he knew what happened when he did that.

 

Jensen peered at his face in the mirror, still so unfamiliar even after three years; with no past that he could remember, Jensen felt like a ghost.

 

Jensen looked down at the silver ring encircling his finger; he couldn't believe that after three years he still couldn't remember his wedding or his life before the accident.  He had thought that living with Jeff every day, seeing him all the time, would have triggered some sort of memory.  But, no, there had been nothing.  There was only one thing worse than feeling like a stranger to yourself and that was living with one. 

 

Jensen kind of hated the ring actually and he knew that that was terrible of him since Jeff was his husband and he’d given it to him.  But it burned Jensen's skin; he figured that he had some sort of allergy to it or something.  He’d only taken the ring off once since he’d let the hospital; since Jeff had replaced the bronze one he’d woken up wearing with this silver one.  Jeff had told him not to; he’d said that the silver one was a family heirloom and that he would be very upset if Jensen ever lost it. 

 

In the first few weeks, Jensen had been so desperate to get his life back that he’d actually _wanted_ to wear the thing, even with the sting that it brought to his skin.

 

But after a while, when he finally accepted that if Jeff's face couldn’t do anything to bring forth his memories, he guessed that a piece of metal wouldn't either. So he’d taken it off, it had felt so good to have the damn thing off his finger, even if it had been just been for the few hours that Jeff was at work.

 

Jeff had come home early that day and had not been...pleased to find Jensen not wearing the ring. Jensen had learned, or perhaps _re-learned_ , he didn't know, a few important lessons that day. He hadn't taken the ring off again.

 

Jensen tensed as he felt arms wind around his chest and stomach, and tried not to wince as a hard chest pressed against his bruised back.  'Morning sweetheart.'

 

'Morning.'  Jensen replied, all fake smiles and false cheerfulness.  He'd already messed up once; he wasn't going to do that again in the same 24 hours.  He was still sore from last night; Jeff was anything but gentle when he was mad and Jensen was going to be feeling the evidence of his wrath all day.  Maybe _that_ would help remind Jensen to keep his damn mouth shut in future; it never really seemed to though.

 

'You working the day shift at the hospital?'  Jensen asked, hoping to distract Jeff away from any thoughts of taking Jensen back to bed; he could feel Jeff's morning wood against his ass and he was _so_ not up to that right then. 

 

Even if his ass didn’t feel quite as raw as it had felt in the past after some of their sessions, he really didn’t think he was up to faking his pleasure the way he usually had to.  Sex with Jeff just never felt right, even when he hadn't been beaten; Jeff just didn't feel right inside him, he didn’t _smell_ right.  And Jensen knew how weird _that_ sounded, but that didn’t stop it being true. 

 

The first few times they'd had sex Jensen hadn't even been able to get hard, and Jeff really hadn't liked that.  Jensen had made a concerted effort to come in all there future encounters after Jeff damn near broke his wrist the third time he hadn’t come in their time together.

 

It was strange because Jensen always pictured the same man when they were having sex and it wasn't anyone that Jensen knew.  He didn’t know an _awful_ lot of people; Jeff had said that Jensen didn’t really have a lot of friends, since he hadn’t worked before the accident, and the older man didn’t like Jensen to watch that much TV so Jensen just didn’t know where the mystery man had come from.  Jensen would _definitely_ have remembered this man, he was sure of it.

 

The man was taller than Jeff, by a few inches easily, so he was taller than Jensen too, and broader and more muscular than either of them.  He had these huge hands that were able to hold Jensen down or caress him lovingly, in equal measure.  Jensen could almost smell him every time he imagined those hands running down his body; the man smelled of the woods, fresh and clean and free. 

 

Jensen didn't really need to imagine anything else, that was usually enough to get the job done, but in his quieter moments when he just wanted to lose himself in the fantasy a little, he would picture kind eyes and bright smile.  It might have been a complete fantasy but whenever Jensen thought of it, he got hard in about two seconds flat.

 

He couldn’t even claim that the man might have been a past lover since Jeff had already told him that they’d been together since Jensen had gotten out of high school; that he’d been Jensen's first and only boyfriend.  It was only on the days ending in a ‘y’ that Jensen wished that his fantasy man was real.

 

'Yeah,' the man groaned, and kissed the nape of Jensen's neck.  'Got a meeting in an hour so I've gotta go.  Sorry, babe.'  Jensen felt his husband grind against his ass, 'I wish I could stay in bed with you all day.'

 

'I know, but you've got work and I'm due at the library at ten so we better get ready.'  Jensen turned in Jeff's arms and cupped the man’s face, kissing him chastely on the lips.  ‘We’ve always got tonight though, right?'  Hopefully, the burn in his ass would have calmed down a little by then.

 

'Yeah, you're right, we have. Now outta here, before I change my mind and just call in sick.'  Jensen all but ran out of the bathroom, hoping that his husband didn't notice his haste to obey his request.  
  
  
[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/31853.html#cutid1)

 


	2. Chapter Two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Words in Italics denote events that happened in the past (memories).

** Chapter Two. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

It was strange only knowing two things about your life; he knew that his name was Jensen Morgan and that his husband was Jeffrey Dean Morgan. That was pretty much it. Everything before the crash was gone; erased like it had never existed.

 

Jensen was just lucky that he'd been brought in to the hospital that Jeff worked at, after the accident, or they weren't sure that Jensen would ever have found out who he was. He’d had no ID on him; the only thing that he had had was the bronze ring around his finger. The inscription on the inside had given the staff his name at least. 'To Jensen, till the end of time. J.'

 

Jensen had kept that ring, even after Jeff had replaced it with the silver one. Jeff had told him that the silver one was much more expensive and that the bronze one had merely been a temporary substitute whilst the silver one was being engraved. This one said. 'Always Mine. Jeff.'

 

That was another thing that Jensen hated about the silver ring. It felt like some sort of brand on his hand, every time he looked at it he could almost feel Jeff's possessive touch on him.

 

It was weird because he never like felt that when he looked at the bronze ring but Jeff must have bought that one for Jensen too. The words were so different; it was hard to believe that they were written by the same man. When Jensen looked at the bronze band, the only touches he felt were warm and loving and, though he still felt thoroughly claimed when he looked at it, the possession, the feeling of ownership, didn’t feel wrong.

 

As he stood in the library, restacking the books that had been brought back in, Jensen thought back to that first day in the hospital. It might as well have been the first day of Jensen’s life for all he could remember before it.

 

_'Jensen, sweetheart, open your eyes.' He gingerly opened his eyes against the bright lights, his nose wrinkling at the strong smell of disinfectant. ‘There you go.’_

 

_He looked up at the man sitting at his bedside, who was casually stroking his hand through his short blonde hair. The man looked to be in his mid-forties, with hazel eyes, and had a rugged look about him that oozed confidence. The man smiled down at him, ‘How you feeling, babe?’_

 

_‘I…’ He rasped out, his voice scratchy from disuse, ‘Who are you?’_

 

_The man looked hurt and shocked and he immediately wanted to apologise. Maybe he knew this man, maybe they’d been introduced, but he couldn’t place his face. As he searched his mind, he found nothing. Not just no memory of this man, no memory of anything, not even his own name. What had the man called him? Jensen?_

 

_He started to panic; what had happened to him that meant that he couldn’t even remember his own name? What was he going to do? Where was he going to go? He vaguely heard the rapid alarms beeping around his bed. ‘I…I…’_

 

_‘Calm down, Jensen, you’re safe, you’ve had an accident.’ Jensen tried to slow down his breathing; it helped a little, his vision growing clearer again._

 

_‘Who…?’ He asked again._

 

 _‘I’m Jeff, your husband. You’re Jensen Morgan. Your doctor said that there might be some memory loss but it seems to be far more extensive than we thought.’ Jensen shook his head, this man was his_ husband? _Jensen couldn’t remember the man and he was_ Jensen Morgan _; the words just sounded so wrong. ‘Here, look.’ The man took his hand gently and pulled off the bronze (bronze?) ring that encircled his finger. Jeff held it up before his face and he read the inscription. So his name_ was _Jensen then and the ring obviously came from someone whose name began with a ‘J’ so this man_ must _have been his husband. Besides, who just claims someone that’s not already theirs?_

 

_‘Oh…I’m sorry.’ Jensen said quietly; he felt that it was sort of the least he could do since he’d apparently completely forgotten his husband._

 

_‘That’s alright, sweetheart, I’m just glad that I saw you when they brought you in.’ A noise near the door had them both turning to look at the intern who stood there._

 

_‘Uh…Dr. Morgan, can I talk to you?’ Jeff nodded and rose to walk over to the door._

 

_They spoke in hushed voices but Jensen could hear them just fine, clearly there was nothing wrong with his hearing even if his memory was shot to hell._

 

_‘There’s something weird on the blood test results. The guys in the lab don’t know what to make of it and since he’s your patient now, we thought that you might like to have a look. See what you can make of it.’ The nervous kid explained to his superior. Jeff was Jensen’s doctor? That was a little…odd, right?_

 

_‘Oh my God!’ He heard Jeff gasp. What was it? Was Jensen going to die? Did he have some weird disease that was so rare that even the lab technicians had never seen it before?_

 

_‘What is it doctor?’ The kid asked._

 

_‘Oh.’ Jeff coughed, a little uncomfortably, ‘It’s nothing, I’ve seen this a few times before, I know exactly how to deal with it.’_

 

_‘Doctor, I don’t thi…_

 

_‘That’ll be all Sam, thanks.’ Jeff all but shoved the kid out of the room and moved to sit back down by Jensen’s side._

 

 _‘Everything all right Jeff?’ Jensen asked when the man didn’t say anything. Jeff simply looked down at him, a slightly strange smile on his face and, if Jensen was honest, the look in his eyes seemed_ triumphant _. It wasn’t an altogether comfortable feeling having Jeff look at him like that, husband or not._

 

_‘Yeah, babe, everything’s perfect.’ He kissed Jensen on the forehead before increasing Jensen’s meds and sending him back to sleep._

 

_As soon as Jensen woke up again, Jeff arranged for him to be discharged. The first week was a bit of a nightmare; they were moving to Chicago the Monday after Jensen came home. Jeff explained that he’d accepted a new job and that they’d been planning the move long before Jensen had had his accident._

 

_Secretly, Jensen didn’t to leave; not only did he think that living in the house that they’d lived in, before he lost his memory, would help him remember his past but he had this niggling feeling that he was leaving something important behind. Something that he needed._

 

_But Jeff insisted; their new house had already been bought and Jeff had handed his notice in to the hospital so there was nothing Jensen could do but go along with it._

 

Even after all these years, thinking back to that time always made the huge hole in Jensen, the one that he never seemed to be able to fill, feel like an open wound. He _knew_ that he’d left something important behind that day; he just didn’t know what that something was.  
  
  
  
[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/32242.html#cutid1)

 

 


	3. Chapter Three.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All words in italics denote events that happened in the past (memories.)

** Chapter Three. **

 

** Jared. **

 

Jared sat opposite his date, on his fourth glass of wine, half listening to her talk about ‘The Gilmore Girls,’ with a fervour that bordered on obsessive, and half watching the seconds tick by on the clock on the wall behind her.  No, that wasn’t fair…it was totally more like 75/25 in the clock’s favour. 

 

His mother had set him up on a blind date with Debbie?  Diana?  Whatever…his mom had set him up with this girl, despite his protests that he didn’t want to go, that he didn’t _want_ to be with anyone but Jensen.  But then she’d given him a look of such pity that he couldn’t take it and had agreed to one date.  Jared had been on several dates over the three years that Jensen had been gone, all of them courtesy of his worried friends and family.  There was little harm in it really; there was absolutely no way that he’d form any kind of bond with any of these people since Jensen was his one and only and Jared fully intended to get him back one day.  There was just no question in his mind that Jensen would return to him. 

 

His family and friends had long given up hope that Jensen would return; some thought him dead but the less charitable ones, the ones that Jared no longer spoke to, said that he’d run off with another wolf.  They said that Jensen’s wolf senses would have brought him back, if he’d wanted to come back, so the fact that he hadn’t returned indicated that either he didn’t want to or that he couldn’t because he was dead. 

 

Jared knew that neither of those things were true; Jensen loved him as much as he loved Jensen, they were made for each other.  Nothing felt right without Jensen and Jared knew that he would spend the rest of his life searching for his lost mate if he had to. 

 

Those first six months, Jared had spent every waking moment looking for the man, searching every place they’d ever been to together, only to come up with nothing.  It was as though Jensen had vanished off the face of the planet, which made absolutely no sense, since his mate was the least reckless person that Jared knew.  Jensen would never have done anything so massive without planning extensively in advance.  And of course, telling Jared. 

 

He’d taken six months off his job as a cop, following up almost non-existent leads and using everything at his disposal to try to find the man; psychics may or may not have featured at some point – that was definitely something that he would _not_ be telling his ever logical mate about when he finally found him.  But still there had been nothing.

 

Jared’s felt like his heart had stopped the moment his mother had suggested giving Jensen a memorial service.   He was sure that it still hadn’t started beating again and he knew that it wouldn’t until he held his mate safely in his arms once more. 

 

Jared had finally returned to his job, focusing on his work and putting every ounce of restless energy he had into it.  He quickly worked his way up the ranks until he was recruited by the FBI at the young age of 25.  He knew that Jensen would be so proud of him when he came back; he’d always been Jared’s biggest supporter in joining the force, even when Jared’s own parents had wanted him to follow in his Dad’s footsteps and become a lawyer. 

 

At night, Jared barely slept, unable to settle without his mate wrapped tightly in his arms; even after three years, the empty space in his bed left him feeling cold inside.  Jared had taken to wandering the streets at night, walking through the city, in the vague hope that maybe, one day, he would just happen to run into Jensen.  Jared was all out of ideas at that point and he couldn’t simply do nothing.  Besides, Jared _truly_ believed that it could happen, after all it was their destiny to be together; surely Fate would give them a helping hand just this once.  Jared promised every deity he could think of that once they gave Jensen back to him, he would never let the man go again.

 

He just hoped that, one day soon, they actually started listening.

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/32451.html#cutid1)

 


	4. Chapter Four.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All words in italics denote events that happened in the past (memories.)

 

** Chapter Four. **

 

** Jared. **

 

Debbie, or whatever her name was, was glaring impatiently at him when he looked back at her; clearly he’d let himself get distracted by thoughts of Jensen again.  It happened a lot but this girl, not really knowing him, wasn’t used to it like his friends and colleagues were so she seemed decidedly put-out that he’d been ignoring her ever _fascinating_ analysis of ‘The Gilmore girls’.  I mean really?  _Jensen would never have talked about anything like that,_ he thought meanly.

 

Jared smiled fondly when he thought of their first date together and how Jensen had rambled on about his love of ‘The Lord of the Rings’.  It had been so damn adorable that Jared had just known that they were meant to spend the rest of their lives together.

 

_Jared knocked on the green door of the Ackles’ house; they were new to the neighbourhood and the pack so he didn’t really know any of them, well, except their son.  Jensen had joined their high school a couple of months ago when his family had moved to the neighbourhood and Jared had nearly choked on his tongue the first time he’d seen him.  He was pretty sure that he hadn’t been alone in that reaction either, even if the man himself had no clue that half the school was panting over him._

 

_Not only was the boy absolutely gorgeous, but he was also shy as all hell and had this adorable tendency to blush and bite his bottom lip when he got nervous – yeah, Jared was pretty close to smitten by the end of the first week.  Jared had always been confident, even before he’d shot up to his impressive 6 foot 5” height and become captain of the basketball team which happened to make him pretty much the most popular guy in school.  He had approached Jensen in the third week of him arriving at Jameson High._

 

 _Jared had cornered him at his locker one morning, planning to ask the boy out and maybe,_ probably _, get his first taste of those plush, soft looking lips.  Needless to say it hadn’t gone as planned; Jensen had just blushed bright red and run away down the corridor,_ away _from Jared and taking said plush lips with him.  That had_ never _happened to Jared before, yeah people often got a little flustered when he asked them out but someone out and out running away from him…not so much. It was disconcerting to say the least._

 

 _Jared had gone to his best friends, Chad and Sandy, for advice and then even to his brother, but the next few encounters yielded scarily similar results.  In the end, Jared had done something that he would_ never _admit to doing to another living soul; it was just too pathetic for words but Jared was desperate and he was willing to do whatever it took to get Jensen to, at least, talk to him._

 

 _Jared had slipped the note, with his name and the words, ‘Do you like me, yes or no?’ written on it, into Jensen’s locker early on Friday morning.   Scrawled on the reverse side he’d written, ‘Date me?  Tomorrow night, yes or no?’  Both sides had little boxes for Jensen to tick, and Jared might,_ might _have made the ‘no’ boxes really_ really _small, but hey it was just because his pen slipped…twice._

 

_When Jared had opened his locker door later in the day, the little note had fluttered out.  Jared had snatched it up eagerly, a little too eagerly really, and looked at the first side.  A grin had spread across Jared’s face as the ‘yes’ box had been shakily ticked and his smile had increased ten-fold when he’d seen the mirroring ‘yes’ on the other side.  Jared hadn’t wanted to scare Jensen off, not when that he’d finally gotten him, so he’d spoken to one of Jensen’s new friends, Chris Kane, and had asked the boy to tell Jensen that he’d pick him up the next night at eight.  For once, the smirk on the guy’s face was comforting rather than irritating since Jared hoped that it meant that Jensen kind of liked him too._

 

_So there he was, standing on the Ackles’ doorstep, dressed in a pair of smart slacks and a white button down, waiting for Jensen to answer the door._

 

_The door swung open a moment later and a little girl, in a frilly pink dress, stood on the threshold; she couldn’t have been more than twelve but the look in her eye made her look a little too smart for a twelve year old, much like his own terror of a sister._

 

_‘Uh…hi, I’m Jared.  I’m here for Jensen?’_

 

_‘Really?’_

 

_‘Really.’  Jared grinned, she was kind of adorable actually and she had the same cute freckles as her brother._

 

 _‘You sure?  ‘Cause you’re really good looking and_ really _popular and Jensen’s well…Jensen.’  Jared bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing; he could just imagine Megan, his little sister, saying the exact same thing about him.  In fact she probably had._

 

 _‘Well I think Jensen’s pretty damn awesome so, yeah, I’m sure that I’m here for him.’    Jared glanced up when he caught a movement out of the corner of his eye and saw Jensen coming down the stairs, wide eyed, with a blush staining his fair cheeks.  He was dressed in a pair of old looking sweats and a thin t-shirt;_ Jesus _, how could anyone look_ that _sexy in a pair of sweats?_

 

_‘Jared?  You’re…here?’  Jensen choked out, sounding shocked._

 

_‘Didn’t Kane tell you?’  Jared made a mental note to punch Kane in the face on Monday, the asshole._

 

_Jensen raised a hand up to rub the back of his neck, the blush on his cheeks darkening, ‘Um…yeah…he did…I just thought…’  He trailed off, looking away from Jared._

 

 _God, the guy was so fucking adorable that Jared just didn’t know how to handle it.  Clearly Jensen had thought that Jared was trying to pull a prank on him or something so Jared just took the initiative and continued, ‘Well, I_ am _here so why don’t you go get your stuff and we can head out.’_

 

_Jensen nodded, his expression still caught between shock and embarrassment, and in doing so caught a glimpse of his clothes.  If there had been a way for Jensen’s cheeks to get any redder, Jared was sure that they would have, ‘I’ll just…I’ll have to…just let me get changed.’_

 

 _‘You don’t have to.’  Jared shrugged.  Jensen oozed sex appeal without even realising it; Jared was sure that the boy could wear a bin liner and_ still _be the most good-looking guy in town.  But Jensen and his alluring outfit were already gone so Jared accepted little Mack’s invitation to wait inside the house._

 

_Jared was sitting on the sofa, drinking a soda provided by Jensen’s awesome mom, when he heard footsteps coming down the wooden stairs.  He turned around and made to get up, only to grab the back of the couch as his breath caught in his throat.  Jared had never had such a strong reaction to anyone, not all that surprising really since Jared had never met anyone like Jensen before._

 

_Jensen was wearing tight black jeans and a smart black shirt that brought out the bright green of his eyes perfectly.  His hair was gelled into a slightly softer style than he wore to school (Jared had to avoid referring to it as ‘bed hair’ - he didn’t think that his brain could handle that image right then since it was pretty much short circuiting as it was), and his face held the faintest blush as he descended the stairs._

 

_Jared had never been so hard so fast in his life; thank Christ for Chad’s crude advice about wearing his slightly looser pants.  Before he even realised that he was moving, Jared was standing in front of Jensen, at the bottom of the staircase, looking down at the boy’s beautiful face.  Jensen just stared back up at him, his lips slightly parted, and his breathing a little quicker than normal.  ‘You look amazing Jen.’_

 

 _The blush deepened,_ Jesus Christ _, ‘Y…You too.’  Jared beamed at Jensen and grabbed his hand to lead him out to his brother’s motorbike.  He could_ totally _have taken his parent’s car; they’d offered, but Jared had decided that the bike was the better way to go.  His brother had smirked at him, as he’d handed over the keys, and winked, ‘Good choice bro, I’ve taught you well.’  Jared had flipped him off at the time but he couldn’t deny the statement; he knew that Jeff had pretty much bought the bike so that his dates had to cling to him on the ride.  Jared had just never realised what a genius his brother was until that moment._

 

_Jared tossed the spare helmet to Jensen and put his own on his head.  Jensen just stared at it, biting his lip, so Jared walked over to him, ‘Don’t worry, just keep your arms around me.  I promise I’ll never let anything happen to you.’_

 

_Jared was surprised by how much he meant the words.  Jensen blinked and smiled a little before putting the helmet on his head.  He climbed up behind Jared and clung to the taller man’s waist, resting his head against Jared’s shoulder blade.  Jared had never been so happy in his life._

 

 _That date had been the best of Jared’s life.  It took a little time to get Jensen talking but as soon as Jared had brought up books, like Sandy had told him to, Jensen was off.  Jared was completely enthralled as Jensen painted elaborate pictures of fantasy worlds that Jared had never heard of and characters he’d never known.  It didn’t matter that Jared had no idea what Jensen was talking about, it was still perfect –_ Jensen _was perfect._

 

_Half way through a particularly impassioned speech about how Sam was the real unsung hero of ‘The Lord of the Rings’, Jensen cut himself off abruptly, pursing his lips, and looking embarrassed._

 

_Jared had lost his whole heart to the boy right then and had known that he’d found his One…his mate.  Jared leaned forward and kissed away Jensen’s apology and made promises of a future together, all in that first kiss...it had been the first day of the rest of Jared’s life with the man he loved._

 

Jared shook his head and turned his attention back to the brunette across the table, who was now tapping her foot irritably on the floor.  Really?  Who _actually_ did that?   Debbie apparently.  ‘I’m really sorry, it’s been a long week at work and I’m a little tired.’  Jared apologised, carefully not using the girl’s name since he wasn’t absolutely sure what it was; there was no reason to be rude even though he knew that they would never go out again.  But that wasn’t her fault; it wasn’t her fault that she wasn’t Jensen.

 

‘Don’t worry, honey, I know how important your work is to you.’  _Um, how?_   ‘I think it’s really amazing how dedicated you are to your work, all you need now is someone waiting at home for you when you’re done saving the world.’ 

 

Jared tensed, he _had_ someone to do that, and he certainly didn’t want anyone else, thank you very much.  ‘ _I_ could do that for you, Alpha, I’d make an excellent Beta.’  Jared was sure that that was meant to sound seductive but it just sounded dirty to him and he damn near leapt out of his seat when he felt the woman rub her foot against his thigh. 

 

‘Sorry…like I said, I’m really tired.’  Jared said, his tone sharp and cold as he subtly removed her foot from his thigh.  She looked a little shocked before her expression gave way to a look that was probably supposed to be sexy but really wasn’t.

 

‘Oh, I’d heard you were a gentleman.  There’s no need to be shy Jared,’  _Shy_?  Jared almost laughed in her face; this girl had no idea - had she known some of the things that he and Jensen had gotten up to in the bedroom, she would’ve known that the word ‘shy’ didn’t even feature in Jared’s vocabulary.  ‘I’m a modern woman after all.’  The implication was so damn obvious that Jared would’ve gotten the message had the girl been on the other side of the _world_ and not just on the other side of the table, so her jutting out her breasts at him was really quite unnecessary. 

 

Jared sighed tiredly, completely done with being polite; if the woman was too stupid to take his subtle hints then he’d just have to be a little more clear, and then she’d see just how _shy_ he really was.  He signalled to the waiter, then turned back to the girl.

 

‘Debbie…’

 

‘Denise…’  She corrected, looking a little insulted.  _What-the-fuck-ever_.

 

‘Denise.  You’re a great girl and all but this,’ Jared waved a hand between them, ‘isn’t going anywhere.  I’m sorry, but I’ve already got someone in my life and I’m not looking for anyone else.’  He explained, hoping that he wouldn’t hurt her feelings; she was the daughter of his mom’s friend after all.

 

‘Who, _Jensen_?  Jared, the man’s gone; he left you and he left the pack.  You need to move on and accept that he just wasn’t who you thought he was.’  That was it.  Who did this _bitch_ think she was?

 

‘Right, _Denise,’_ Jared said her name with as much disdain as possible.  ‘My _mate_ is out there somewhere and you’ll do well to never mention his name again.  Are we clear?’  Denise paled as Jared growled out the last words; no-one spoke about Jensen like that; no-one was allowed to judge him, especially when he wasn’t around to defend himself. 

 

Lots of people had judged them when they’d first gotten together since he and Jensen were so different.  But Jared hadn’t listened to any of them then and he certainly wasn’t going to start listening to them now.  Jensen was perfect just the way he was.

 

‘I...I…’ The waiter came over, as Denise struggled for an answer, and his smile faltered when he noticed the chilly air between them.  Jared quickly paid the bill, and got up.  He left Denise a twenty to pay for a cab; there was no way that _that_ girl was getting back in his car now.  Jared ignored the scowl that marred her pretty face; that was just another way that she could never compete with his lover - Jensen, _somehow_ , still managed to look gorgeous even when he was mad. 

 

Denise was fucking lucky to get off that lightly; had she been a guy, Jared would have demanded that they take this outside so that he could make sure she never spoke out of turn about Jensen again.

 

Hell, Jared was pretty sure that Jensen’s best friend, Chris, and the only other person still searching for the man, _would_ have punched her for her comment, woman or not. 

 

Jared wasn’t sure that he would’ve stopped him either. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/32710.html#cutid1)

 

 


	5. Chapter Five.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All words in italics denote events that happened in the past (memories.)

** Chapter Five. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jensen came back from the library, it had been a good day; he’d managed to convince a couple of teenagers to take home ‘The Lord of the Rings’- easily his favourite book (not that that was saying much since he couldn’t remember any literature from before the accident but Jensen still felt that he would have loved the book best regardless) - and had helped an elderly lady find one of her own favourites from her childhood.  So, yeah, all in all, it had been a good day.

 

Jensen walked into the house, a couple of shopping bags in each hand, and went into the kitchen to put dinner on.  He was chopping onions for the pasta sauce when a deep voice behind him nearly made him chop his fingers off, ‘Have a good time at work, Jensen?’

 

Sarcasm in Jeff’s voice was never a good sign, neither was the slight slur colouring his words.

 

‘Uh…yeah, it was good thanks.’  Suddenly, Jeff was right up against his back, his mouth close to Jensen’s ear, and Jensen dropped the knife onto the counter in an attempt to hide his shaking hands.  The man moved so fast and so quietly, especially given his current level of inebriation; he was like a predator stalking its prey, and Jensen really hated the role that he played in that analogy.

 

‘Yeah, I bet you did.’  Jeff spun Jensen round so that Jensen was looking the man in the face; Jeff’s eyes were a little red from drinking and his mouth was pursed in a tight line.  _Definitely_ not good.  ‘Saw you today, with that _man_ , you…you little whore.’

 

Jensen shook his head in denial.  Yes, he’d spoken to a lot of men at the library that day but he’d never been unfaithful to his husband, _never_. 

 

‘DON’T LIE TO ME JENSEN!’  Jensen jumped at the fury in the man’s voice, tonight was not going to end well for him; he could only hope that the whisky would make his husband pass out before they finally made it up to the bedroom.   ‘After everything I’ve done for you, after I took you back even though you’re barely my husband anymore.’  Jensen flinched, that hurt.  He’d tried so hard to be what he’d been before, to be what his husband wanted.  ‘You _know_ nothing, you can _do_ nothing and you’re like a fucking little virgin in the sack.’  Jeff gripped Jensen’s arm hard, Jensen knew that he’d have bruises the next day, and pulled him away from the counter.  ‘Yet here you are giving it up to any random fucker who even looks your way.’  Jeff dragged Jensen along with him to his study as Jensen tried to struggle away from the older man.

 

‘Jeff…please…I didn’t…I’m sorry…’  It made no difference, it never did.  Jeff was fiercely jealous of anyone around Jensen; even at the hospital he’d barely let another person _see_ Jensen, let alone treat him, despite the protests from Jensen’s original doctor.

 

Jeff dragged Jensen into the office and grabbed the silver cuffs from his desk.  Jensen was already shaking his head and pulling away.  The cuffs chafed his skin and made him feel sick to the stomach, not to mention so damn light headed that Jensen barely even knew where he was when he was wearing them, ‘ _Please_ , Jeff don’t…I’m sorry, I didn’t mean…’

 

Jeff walked up to him and took hold of his chin, forcing Jensen to look him in the eye, ‘I know you don’t sweetheart, s’cause you’re a slut.  Always were before, too, and this is why I have to do this.  You have to learn that you can’t just give your ass away to anyone, it’s mine.  It is _mine_ right?’  The fingers holding his chin tightened.

 

Jensen hesitated for a moment, his mind shouting ‘no’, but then he nodded, it would only be worse if he didn’t.  And he _was_ Jeff’s husband; he just didn’t like the idea of being Jeff’s _property_ too.  ‘Right, put your hands out then, you know what to do.’  Jensen felt the first tear slide down his cheek, before he quickly wiped it away. 

 

‘But I…’ 

 

‘Jensen, we can do this the easy way or the hard way but either way you’re getting cuffed to that chair.’  Jensen hesitated again before moving over to the solid oak chair in front of Jeff’s large desk, placing his hands gingerly over the arm.  Jensen shivered as he felt Jeff wind his large body around him from behind and his breath hitched when he felt the first bite of the metal against his skin.  He shied away from the burning sensation, ‘Be still.’  Jensen stilled instantly and the cuffs were closed around his wrists.

 

Immediately, Jensen’s knees gave out and the only thing holding him up was Jeff’s strong arm around his waist.  He tried to breathe through the nausea coursing through him; he assumed that the fear of punishment had become too much for him again and his body had started to check out. 

 

Jeff let Jensen fall to his knees on the floor and he cut off Jensen’s shirt with his sharp silver letter opener, not being careful enough to stop the blade slicing into the bare skin of Jensen’s back.

 

The first blow rocked Jensen’s body forward, the belt buckle dragging painfully across his exposed skin.  The second and third lashes were less of a shock but just as painful since they landed over the first mark. 

 

‘You make me do this, Jensen.  I don’t like it but you need reminding just how lucky you are; I could have left you in that hospital when they told me you didn’t remember anything.  I could force you to get a proper fucking job instead of that job that pays almost fucking nothing so I have to work doubly hard to support your lazy ass.  Hell, do you even know how many of my friends have wanted a night with you?  They wanted to _use_ you but I told them no.  They’re my _friends_ Jensen, but I told them no because you’re mine.  Don’t you think I deserve a little fucking respect for giving you all that and asking for nothing in return?’  ‘Respect’ was punctuated by the belt falling across Jensen’s shoulder blade and digging into the skin.  Jeff was right and the words hurt almost as much as the lashes…almost. 

 

Jensen knew that Jeff was right because, to his own shame, he’d thought of leaving his husband countless times.  But then he’d remembered that he brought hardly anything to their marriage, what with his lack of even the basic high school qualifications and no savings.  Jeff, on the other hand, was a successful, well respected doctor with his own house and more money than he could ever spend.  Had Jeff not been lumbered with Jensen, he would easily have been one of the most eligible bachelors in the city. 

 

Jensen could see the imbalance every day, especially when his husband reminded him of it, and could only feel grateful that the man hadn’t cast him aside and left him to fend for himself with nothing but the clothes on his back.  Jensen had nothing without Jeff, _was_ nothing without Jeff, and the next five lashes all helped to imprint that on his pain addled brain. 

 

And Jensen _had_ married Jeff so he must have loved the man once; it wasn’t Jeff’s fault that Jensen’s stupid brain couldn’t remember it.  Jensen couldn’t toss all those years of marriage aside just because of a few rough moments, right?  Jensen was sure that as soon as he remembered his love for his husband, it would get better…it _had_ to.

 

An hour later and Jensen’s back was red raw; the skin on fire even when the blows weren’t falling and damn near excruciating when they were.  His cries had quietened to soft yelps, as his voice gave out about half an hour in. 

 

Jensen shied away when he felt a gentle hand on his bloody shoulder, but forced himself to relax under his husband’s touch; there was no way that he could handle another beating, he was barely conscious as it was.  ‘Are you alright, sweetheart?’  Jensen wanted to laugh, despite his injuries, but knew that that was never a good idea. Even if his husband hadn’t just torn his back to shreds and hadn’t been steadily drinking his way through his entire liquor cabinet as he’d done it, Jeff really didn’t like to be laughed at. 

 

Jensen just nodded and sighed, relieved, when the cuffs were finally undone.  He clung to the arm of the chair to keep his battered body from collapsing onto the floor.  ‘Up you get.  Let’s get you to bed.’  Jensen groaned as Jeff pulled him to his feet, the skin on his back pulling painfully as he did so.

 

Jeff led Jensen to their bedroom and gently pushed him down onto his stomach on the bed.  Jensen bit his lip nervously, unsure as to what his husband was going to do next. 

 

He felt the antiseptic that Jeff always used on his wounds and gasped, shifting away slightly from the painful touch.  Back in the beginning Jensen had tried to insist that he didn’t need it, he healed remarkably quickly in general, but that had just started another argument so now Jensen just let Jeff get on with it.  ‘There we are, babe, all better.’  Jeff said as he finished smearing on the cream and put the tube back in the drawer beside the bed. 

 

Jensen buried his face in the pillow as he felt Jeff’s fingers trace down his ass and slip between the cheeks, ‘Gonna make you feel so good now.  Don’t worry, sweetheart, I’m here.’  Jensen was sure that that was meant to be comforting but all it did was send a shiver of fear down his spine. 

 

Jensen kept his head buried in the pillow as Jeff fucked into him with slow, hard, possessive thrusts which spoke of ownership and right.  Thrusts that cut into Jensen in ways that the belt never had. 

 

[NEXT. ](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/33005.html#cutid1)

  
 


	6. Chapter Six.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The words in italics denote events that happened in the past (memories.)

 

** Chapter Six. **

 

** Jared. **

 

Jared sat behind his desk at the station, staring at the account; the person had described Jensen so perfectly that Jared had been sure that it was going to be Jensen.  Only when he got there…it just wasn’t.  

 

Again.  

 

Disappointment was an all too familiar emotion for Jared, after three years of fruitless searching, but that didn’t make each little failure any easier to handle.

 

Jared heard whispering behind him and knew that the other cops in the squad were talking about him.  They didn’t know much about Jensen, only that he was Jared’s husband and that he’d gone missing.  When Jared had joined the FBI he’d told them as little as possible about his life; being a werewolf really wasn’t ideal when working for a government funded organisation.  It helped that there were a few other wolves, high up in the system, that kept their secret safe but it never paid to tell humans too much about themselves, just in case. 

 

‘Another lead…’

 

‘Yeah…up in LA…’

 

‘No…nothing…’

 

‘Poor guy…’

 

‘He should just leave it, the guy _clearly_ doesn’t want to be found or he’s dea…’

 

Jared spun round in his chair, barely keeping the growl that wanted to burst free behind his teeth.

 

‘He’s not dead, and you guys should mind your own fucking business.  I looked into this on my own time, on my _own_ dollar, so you should just keep your noses out of it.’  Jared stood up from his desk, knocking his chair to the floor, and left the office before he did something that he’d regret.

 

He was mad; logically Jared knew that it wasn’t his team’s fault and they all got on remarkably well despite Jared’s distance from them.  They were good people.  But their words just reminded Jared of how it had been at home when Jensen had first gone missing.   

 

_‘Hey Padalecki, I hear that you’ve had no luck on your bitch hunt?  Maybe you should just accept that he’s moved on; you never were enough for that needy little slut.’  In an instant, Jared had David up against the wall, the other Alpha gasping for air against the tight hold that Jared had on his throat._

 

_‘Don’t!  You don’t get to talk about him.  You hear me?  Not ever!’  David had been on Jensen’s back since high school, especially after the Beta had punched him in the jaw, sending him crashing to the floor, in front of the whole basketball team.  David had been asking for it; he was always leaning in too close to Jensen, always brushing his ass in the corridors, always touching him whenever Jensen walked by; it had driven Jared crazy.  But Jensen had made him promise not to do anything, if Jared had attacked David then he could have lost his captaincy of the basketball team and neither of them wanted that._

 

_So Jared had watched and waited…and imagined a variety of scenarios where his fist ending up having a close encounter with David’s face.  Then, one day, David had whispered something in Jensen’s ear and the Beta had finally just snapped and socked David in the jaw.  It had been awesome.   To that day, Jensen still refused to tell him what David had said, probably to save the other Alpha from getting his ass kicked by Jared._

 

_But ever since then, David had just had a thing about Jensen, always cutting him down, demeaning his Beta status; it was stupid since everyone knew that Betas were just as important in the community as Alphas.  It was only a few unmated Alphas that thought differently; David being one of them._

 

**_‘_ ** _What’s the matter, Jared, you afraid I might be right?’  The man wheezed out, not only was David an asshole, he was clearly amazingly stupid; Jared could snap his neck like a twig.  Jared was one of the strongest Alphas in the pack, there had even been talk that he might take over as Pack Alpha one day; David was a fucking idiot if he wanted to take Jared on._

 

_But Jared was totally up for it right then; it might help relieve some of the frustration from another day of failed searching._

 

_‘You really don’t know when to shut up do you?’  Jared snarled into the shorter man’s face._

 

_‘Just saying what everyone’s thinking; Jensen was always gagging for it and it was only a matter of time before he left to find himself some new meat.’  Jared growled and threw David across the bar and into the wall.  The body bounced off the plaster, leaving a David-shaped indentation behind._

 

 _Jared stalked over and dragged the cringing man to his feet, slamming him against the wall and latching his teeth onto the man’s neck.  Jared could feel his canines lengthen with the intense, almost feral, desire to rip the Alpha’s lying throat out.  Instead, he forced them back and sunk his human teeth into the man’s neck, deep enough to draw blood and hopefully scar the flesh.  He wanted David to remember what happened when he bad mouthed Jared’s mate.  He wanted_ every _person in that bar, who thought Jensen had just deserted them, to realise that they would have to answer to Jared if they aired their views._

 

_David whimpered and struggled but Jared’s jaws held fast, ripping at the vulnerable skin of the man’s neck – not only would the bite leave a nasty wound, it was beyond humiliating for any Alpha to be held in such a submissive hold._

 

_Jared felt a hand on his shoulder, ‘Come on, man, let him go.  We don’t want anyone to get Mitch.’  Jared shook his head slightly, relishing the pained cry that it drew from the pinned man.  ‘Jay, you know that Jen wouldn’t want you to get into trouble, not over him and certainly not over this asshole, come on.’  Chris was right.  Jared opened his jaws, letting the bloody Alpha fall to the ground in a heap.  No-one went to help him, either out of loyalty to Jensen or fear of Jared, and, at that moment, Jared didn’t care which it was._

 

David had stayed away from Jared after that, but Jared was sure that the man was still spreading his poisonous lies to anyone who would listen.  Fortunately, that was only a select few and they already stayed out of Jared’s way so the worst that he heard were cruel rumours.  He supposed that he could live with that; he’d let Jensen show them all when he got home.

 

[NEXT. ](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/33105.html#cutid1)

  
 


	7. Chapter Seven.

** Chapter Seven. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jensen could feel it, just underneath his skin, clawing at him like a wild beast trying to burst out.  He hated it and he hated even more what it meant.  It had been months since his last attack and Jensen still wasn’t ready for this one.  Jensen could still remember the first time he’d felt like this, well the first time since his accident anyway.

 

 _Jensen paced the room, his skin too tight, his stomach tied in knots.  He didn’t know why he felt like this, Jeff had just said that it was perfectly normal and surely the man would know, being a doctor and all.  But it didn’t feel perfectly normal to Jensen, it felt anything_ but _normal.  Jeff had told him that he’d always been like this; that, a couple of times a year, Jensen would get strangely agitated and Jeff would always take a couple of days off work to look after him and deal with it._

 

_Jeff was sat on the bed, watching Jensen pace their bedroom.  ‘Come here, sweetheart.’  Jensen walked over to his husband and stood between the man’s spread legs, gnawing almost viciously on his bottom lip.  ‘Do you want me to make it better, babe?’_

 

_Jensen didn’t like the suggestive tone in Jeff’s voice or the accompanying heat in the man’s eyes but he didn’t know what to do, he felt like he was burning up from the inside out.  He nodded jerkily at his husband and was immediately pulled into Jeff’s lap.  Jensen gasped when he felt the other man’s erection against his ass and while his mind was urging him to pull away, his body couldn’t deny that it felt good.  It grounded him, and he felt his breathing become a little steadier._

 

_Jensen pushed tentatively back against his husband’s cock, in the hope of calming the unsettled feelings racking his body.   ‘That’s it, Jen, that’s it.’  Jeff pulled him down into his lap at the same time that Jensen ground down so that Jensen was practically riding the man’s lap._

 

_Suddenly, Jensen was flipped onto his back on the bed and stripped out of his pants, ‘So pretty, knew you’d be perfect the moment I laid eyes on you.’  Jensen frowned; Jeff seemed to be talking more to himself than to him._

 

_His confusion was short lived though as he felt two fingers breach his ass; there was hardly any pain, it was masked by the most pleasure he’d ever experienced at Jeff’s hands - it felt like every nerve in his body was hard-lined to his dick.  Jeff quickly took out his fingers and replaced them with his cock._

 

_Jensen winced, preparing himself for the harsh sting that he always got from Jeff’s half-assed prep, but the feeling of Jeff filling him, for once, actually felt pretty good.  It lessened the burn running over his skin, easing the itch lodged deep inside him that was slowly driving him mad._

 

 _Jensen’s head fell back against the pillow and a wave of relief washed over him.  ‘Look at that, just made for me weren’t you, sweetheart.’  As soon as Jeff spoke though, the relief vanished and Jensen tensed up; Jeff’s voice was just…just wrong, it wasn’t what Jensen wanted to hear.  Jeff pulled out and thrust back in, and Jensen closed his eyes and imagined his fantasy man, the man he_ really _wanted to be with.  It was awful…Jeff was his_ husband _, but Jensen just couldn’t help it._

 

_Minutes later, Jensen came untouched, something that had never happened before with Jeff, and he slumped back against the bed as Jeff continued to pound into him.  Once he came back to himself, Jensen realised that he was still hard…that was weird, right?  He looked up at the man hovering over him, who just smiled and carried on fucking into him._

 

_While it still felt good, it just didn’t feel like enough and Jensen didn’t know why.  Jeff was pretty well endowed, Jensen’s sore ass most mornings was adequate testimony to that fact, but it was like Jensen’s body was waiting for something else…something more.  After Jensen came a second time, and Jeff had finally come as well, Jensen was shocked and more than a little concerned to find that he was still hard._

 

_‘It’s alright babe, it’s perfectly normal.  We had some tests done a few years ago but they all came back negative.’  Jeff leaned down and kissed Jensen dirtily, fucking his tongue deep into Jensen’s mouth, ‘It just means we’re in for a really fun weekend.’  Jensen gulped, even though he felt a little less restless and feverish now, the idea of spending the weekend in bed with his husband didn’t exactly fill him with excitement like he thought it probably should._

 

Jensen shuddered at the memory, debating once again whether he would be able to hide this from Jeff.  Maybe, the man wouldn’t realise and he’d just carry on going in to work as usual and leave Jensen to ride this out...whatever _this_ was, Jeff had never quite gotten round to telling him. 

 

No, Jeff _always_ noticed every little thing that Jensen tried to hide, and Jensen could never hide this very well.  Sighing, he set out to make his way home, having already told his manager that he’d be off sick for the next couple of days; Carol had just nodded, she was used to it.  Jensen had given her a doctor’s note, from Jeff obviously, after the first time with a few vague details about quarter-yearly treatments or something.  Jensen couldn’t quite remember what it had said anymore but it had gotten the job done and he was able to take a couple of days off, every now and again, when he needed to. 

 

Funnily enough, Jensen wasn’t feeling all that grateful for that. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/33473.html#cutid1)

  
 


	8. Chapter Eight.

** Chapter Eight. **

 

** Jared. **

 

Jared gently pushed Jensen down onto the white sheets.  He kissed his way along the Beta’s jaw and down the man’s neck to his chest, nipping and biting across the pale, freckled skin.  Jensen gasped, and arched beneath him; the man was always so responsive - it was completely intoxicating whenever Jared got to have him like this. 

 

Jared finally reached the waistband of Jensen’s pants and licked the patch of skin above them before pulling them down, just an inch, to reveal the jut of the man’s hipbones.  His thumb massaged slow circles into Jensen’s right hip while he closed his mouth over the left hip bone; Jared suddenly bit down hard and sucked a deep bruise into the skin.  Jensen bucked up off the bed at the sudden shock of pain, gasping and panting; Jared could smell the arousal pouring off his mate.  He whipped off Jensen pants, leaving his mate spread out beneath him - all perfect lines and soft skin - he was amazing. 

 

Jared swooped down to steal another kiss from his lover, thrusting his tongue into the other man’s mouth as Jensen opened up to him.  Jared pulled away, his chest heaving, and kissed along Jensen’s cheekbone before latching onto the man’s ear lobe and biting gently.  ‘I love you, I love you so fucking much.’  He whispered roughly in the Beta’s ear; Jared had never felt like this about anyone.

 

‘I…I love you too.  _Please_ …’  Jensen rocked his erection up against Jared’s body, clearly looking for some kind of friction.

 

‘Okay, baby, it’s okay.’  Jared soothed, as he let one hand trail slowly down Jensen’s body and close around the Beta’s cock; the man’s hips bucked off the bed again, ‘So good for me, always so good for me, Jen.’  He pumped Jensen slowly; just fast enough to keep him on the edge of orgasm but not fast enough to get him off…not yet. 

 

‘ _Please_ …’

 

Jared chuckled and moved down Jensen’s body, letting go of the man’s hardness and ignoring the little whine that came from Jensen.  He tapped Jensen’s thigh, he had to do it a couple of times before he managed to get the desperate Beta’s attention, ‘Knees up, baby.’  Jensen scrambled to get his legs bent up to his chest so that Jared could see his perfect little hole.  It was leaking all over the bed covers, and Jared felt his cock twitch at the sight. 

 

Jared ripped off his own pants before settling between Jensen’s spread legs.  He widened them a little more, throwing his lover a little off balance; he liked Jensen like that - completely at his mercy, taking whatever Jared wanted to give him.

 

Jared leaned in a licked a stripe from Jensen’s hole all the way to the tip of his cock.  Jared grinned at the high keen that echoed through the room.  Without warning, he pushed a long finger into Jensen’s ass, punching a gasp from Jensen at the sudden intrusion.  Thanks to the Beta’s natural slick, Jared’s finger slid in easily, followed by two, then three, as he worked the man open. 

 

Jared didn’t really need to open up his lover like this; Beta werewolves’ bodies always responded to their mate, instinctively opening up to let their Alpha in, so he _could_ have just thrust into Jensen with very little discomfort to the other man.  But Jared liked to do it this way; sure there were times when prep went out the window, when Jared just needed to claim his Beta, but when they had the time, Jared liked to open Jensen up, nice and slow, and watch the Beta writhe on his fingers, begging for Jared to fuck him.

 

‘Oh _god_ …Please…please…please,’ Jensen repeated, over and over again, under his breath and Jared knew exactly what that his mate needed.  He pulled his fingers out of Jensen’s ass and pushed in with his cock, all the way to the hilt.  Jensen’s back arched and Jared had to clamp firmly down on his mate’s hips to keep from being thrown off the bed.  He knew Jensen by then; despite the man’s natural shyness, he was a damn wildcat in bed.  ‘Oh god.’  Jensen gasped out again.

 

Jared leaned down and kissed Jensen on the lips, just once, before pulling out and slamming back in, aiming for Jensen’s prostate; it only took a couple of thrusts to find it and, by then, Jensen was gasping and gripping at the sheets.  Jared could feel his knot expanding and pulling at Jensen’s rim with every pass as Jensen moaned, ‘I’m gonna…gonna...’

 

‘Do it, baby, do it for me.’  Jared grunted above him, not stopping his thrusts, but wrapping a hand round his mate’s cock.  As soon as his fingers closed around the flesh, Jensen came with a yell all over Jared’s hand.  Jared gasped as his knot lodged in his mate’s ass and he followed his lover over the edge, spilling come into his mate’s willing body.   

 

Jared woke up, gasping, and ran a hand through his hair; it was sweaty and sticking to his forehead.  He touched the copper ring on his left finger and felt the tears spring to his eyes; it wasn’t the first dream that he’d had about Jensen, far from it, but it still hurt every time he woke up and realised that that was all it was. 

 

He swung his legs off the bed and went to his kitchen to make coffee, like so many nights, he knew he wouldn’t sleep again after that. 

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jensen woke up panting, his boxers sticky; he tried to calm his breathing so as to not wake his husband.  He’d have to be really careful getting out of bed in the morning so that Jeff didn’t see the mess of his boxers; they’d both know that it hadn’t been thoughts of Jeff that had caused it.

 

Jensen’s hand unconsciously moved to the small copper band in his pocket, stroking it as he went back to sleep.

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/33681.html#cutid1)

  
 


	9. Chapter Nine.

** Chapter Nine. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Not only did Jensen not want to be there, he hated going out with his husband’s work colleagues at the best of times, but tonight he was feeling overly restless for some reason.  Jeff’s hand lay, possessively, on his knee and the urge to slap it off was almost too strong to ignore.  And Jensen could have sworn that the silver ring on his finger was burning his skin more than it normally did.  He fiddled with the metal, barely resisting the impulse to just pull the damn thing off and throw it across the bar. 

 

What was doubly strange was that Jensen was half hard in his seat; he knew that it had nothing to do with his husband, who was sitting next to him on his right, or the man on his left, whose hand brushed against his leg so frequently that the touch was _clearly_ anything but accidental. 

 

Jensen squirmed again in his seat, feeling his face flush, and felt the hand on his knee tighten.  He looked up into the narrowed eyes of his husband and quickly ducked his head away again, embarrassed.  Jensen wasn’t sure whether Jeff was aware of his arousal or not, probably not since Jeff had never really inspired all that much desire in Jensen.

 

‘I think you need to go outside and get some fresh air, sweetheart.’  Jeff suggested, his voice tight and his hand tighter.  That didn’t bode well; Jensen wasn’t entirely sure what he’d done wrong but he nodded anyway, hoping that the fresh air might do him some good. 

 

** Jared. **

 

Jared sat at the bar with Chad; he and his team had been called in to Chicago to work a case that had totally stumped the local police force and Chad and Sandy had decided to come up to the city with him.  They’d managed to solve the case and the murderer was now sitting in a jail cell awaiting his trial.  Jared was pretty sure that the man was going away for life; it was the only satisfaction that he got nowadays.  

 

Jared went to take another drink of his beer, only to stop suddenly, the bottle inches from his mouth.  He scented the air quickly, something he tried not to do outside the den, and then slammed the bottle down on the counter.  Jared inhaled again, deeper this time, and felt his cock harden in his jeans and his breath become fast and shallow.  He stood up quickly, jumping when he felt a hand on his arm.

 

‘Jay?  What is it?’  Chad’s concerned eyes trailed down Jared’s body, clearly searching for an explanation for the Alpha’s odd behaviour, before his face broke into a sly smirk when he reached Jared’s tented pants, ‘Well it’s about fucking time!  Go get ‘em stud.’

 

‘No…no Chad, it’s…I think…’  Jared couldn’t get his brain to function, not with that scent so close, ‘It’s Jensen.’  He said, finally, barely able to get the words out.

 

Chad’s expression went from lewd to sad in an instant; Jared knew that the other wolf missed Jensen too.  ‘Jay, man.’  He grabbed Jared’s arm again to pull the taller man back down onto his stool.  ‘You _know_ it’s not; you can’t keep doing this to yourself, Jen’s gone.  I know you miss him, we all do, but you have to let him go.  Whoever you’re scenting, Jay, it’s not Jensen.  So go and find that boy or girl and take them home with you.  Lord knows that Jensen would want you to be happy.’

 

Jared tore his arm away and glared at his friend; they were the same lines that his friends and family been feeding him over the last three years and he was sick of them.  ‘NO!’  He damn near shouted and turned on his heel, making his way towards the familiar scent. 

 

Jared followed it outside but when he looked around, he saw nothing.  Inhaling deeply, Jared caught the scent again, and trailed after it.  It led him to a man leaning against the brick wall of the bar; Jared couldn’t see the man’s face but he knew, he just _knew,_ that it was Jensen.  _His_ Jensen. 

 

Suddenly the man tipped his head back, letting it fall against the wall behind him, exposing his long white throat and beautiful face to the moonlight.  Jared’s breath hitched - it was him.

 

Jared broke into a run.  He rushed over to the man and grabbed his arms, pushing him up against the wall. 

 

** Jensen. **

 

‘HEY!’  Jensen shouted as he was slammed, hard, against the brick wall behind him.  He looked up and saw a huge man standing in front of him; the stranger’s large hands were holding Jensen’s biceps in a tight grip.  ‘Let go!’  Jensen struggled, trying to break the man’s hold, but it was surprisingly strong; God only knew what Jeff would do if he saw them like this. 

 

‘Jensen, what are you…?’   The man’s hands dropped away instantly as Jensen continued to squirm.  He sounded so confused, like he couldn’t understand why Jensen wouldn’t want to be assaulted by a stranger in an alley.  Although, to be fair, if he was going to be assaulted, he wouldn’t mind all that much if it was by _this_ man.  An image of throwing himself into the tall man’s arms and wrapping his legs around his waist, while the stranger kissed him breathless, flashed through his mind.  He scolded himself immediately; he was fucking married for God’s sake, what was he _thinking?_

 

Wait?  Did the man just call him Jensen?  Jensen backed up as far as the wall would allow, which wasn’t very far at all, ‘H…how do you know my name?’

 

‘Jen?  It’s me…it’s Jared.’  The hurt in the stranger’s voice tore at Jensen’s heart and he had the overwhelming urge to reach out and comfort his attacker, which was just…just _crazy_.  Jensen scrubbed a hand down his face, trying to clear his head; he shouldn’t be thinking like that, he should be running away from this madman. 

 

Suddenly, the guy grabbed Jensen’s left hand, ‘What the hell is _this_?’  He indicated the silver band on Jensen’s finger. 

 

‘What do you think it is?  It’s a _wedding_ ring, and my _husband’s_ waiting for me inside so if you’ll just….’  He pushed gently at the man’s chest, although his hands lingered on the strong muscles, underneath the man’s fitted shirt, for just a moment too long. 

 

‘ _HUSBAND_?’  The disbelief in the man’s voice rankled Jensen; why couldn’t he be married? 

 

‘Yes husband, as in spouse, as in _significant_ _other_ …now just…’  Jensen pushed a little harder this time, his annoyance making it easier to think through the haze of lust currently dulling his senses.  Jensen felt himself shoved against the wall again and found himself staring into yellow eyes and sharp white teeth. 

 

Jensen gasped and tried to pull away…what the _fuck_? 

 

The man _growled_ at him, full on growled, and Jensen’s heart was beating so hard that it was threatening to break right out of his chest. 

 

Then the man, or whatever the hell he was, was kissing him, all hard lips and sharp bites.  Images flashed through Jensen’s mind, smells and sounds that he didn’t recognise but somehow knew -

 

_Him and this man laughing together._

 

_Him on his back with the tall man hovering over him. _

 

_Him straddling the man’s lap as the man stroked through his hair._

 

Jensen broke away, feeling disorientated from the fierce kiss and the images flashing through in his head; _what was happening to him?_   ‘G..g..get…let me…’  He raised a shaking hand to his painful head.

 

‘Baby, please, you _have_ to know me.’  Jensen looked up again and, while the teeth were gone, the yellow eyes were still there and he cringed away in fear.   The pain in the stranger’s eyes was so obvious that Jensen thought that he could almost feel it too.

 

‘WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?’ 

 

Jeff.

 

Jensen froze, _oh_ _god_ , this was going to end so badly.  He shifted closer to the other man, unconsciously.  He felt stuck between a rock and a hard place; two monsters - one in front of him and one behind.

 

Jensen hesitated, for a moment, before making a decision and stepping towards Jeff; better the devil you know right?  _Right?!_

 

Although everything in him was screaming that he was making the wrong choice, Jensen walked towards his husband.  He raised his hands up in supplication, hoping to calm Jeff down.  This was the man that he was going home with after all and the tall man was…well, he was just something else entirely.  Something that Jensen had no idea how to deal with.  ‘Jeff…I…’

 

‘Shut it, slut.’  The man spat, his eyes narrowing as he looked between the stranger and Jensen.  Jensen could only hope that his husband hadn’t seen him lean towards the other man’s body or there really would be hell to pay when they got home. 

 

‘But…’  Jeff raised his right hand; Jensen winced and closed his eyes, instinctively, waiting for the blow to land across his face.  It was rare for Jeff to hit him in public where he might be seen, he had a reputation to protect after all, but Jensen must really have pissed him off this time. 

 

Only the blow didn’t fall; Jensen squinted open one eye and saw the taller man gripping Jeff’s arm and almost snarling in his husband’s face.  For the first time in three years, Jensen saw something akin to fear in Jeff’s eyes and Jensen couldn’t really blame him, the stranger was like a wild animal.

 

‘If you lay one finger on him, I swear to _God_ , I’ll make you wish you’d never been born.’  The man growled at Jeff, emphasising his words with a hard squeeze to the man’s wrist.  Jeff yelped as the delicate bones were crushed painfully together.

 

Jensen didn’t know what to do.  He was absolutely positive that the stranger could take his husband down; he was easily six and a half feet tall with a broad, muscular body that spoke of a strength that outmatched both him and Jeff.  Jensen moved to the taller man, placed a hand on his arm and pulled slightly; the man’s skin was fiery hot and a shiver ran down Jensen’s spine as soon as their skin met. 

 

Jensen was sure that he felt an answering shiver from the man.  Again, there was that all-consuming urge to just run off with this man rather than go home with Jeff.  His _HUSBAND_.  The idea was ridiculous; granted, the stranger _was_ ridiculously hot and built and… _stop it_.  Jensen shook his head and pulled again until the man’s arm gave way and he turned to look at Jensen.  The look of utter devastation in his eyes made Jensen’s heart clench painfully. 

 

‘Jen…’  The stranger’s hand came up to caress the side of Jensen’s face and, before he could stop himself, Jensen leaned into the touch.  The man just smelled so good, his touch felt right in a way that it had never felt right with Jeff and, yes he was awful for thinking it, but he sort of wished that this man was his husband instead of Jeff. 

 

A loud howl rang out into the night and Jensen snapped his eyes back open, not realising that they’d shut at the man’s soft touch.  He saw the stranger holding his hands over his face and Jeff standing in front of him, grinning a malicious smile and holding an empty bottle. 

 

‘Jeff, what…?’

 

‘Shut up, Jensen, and go wait in the fucking car.’  Jeff ordered, not taking his eyes off the other man.  Jensen’s gut churned so violently, at seeing the man doubled over in pain, that he thought he might be sick.

 

Ignoring his husband, even though he knew that he’d pay for it later, Jensen moved over to the other man and knelt down beside him.  ‘Hey…hey, are you okay?’  Jensen ran his hand through the man’s longish brown hair, it felt like such a natural thing to do that he didn’t even question it. 

 

The man shook his head, but inched nearer, bringing his strong arm up around Jensen’s back and drawing Jensen closer to his body.  Jensen let himself be moved, the man was hurt after all, and no matter what this person/creature was, he clearly needed Jensen’s help.

 

Then it all went black.

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/33973.html#cutid1)

 


	10. Chapter Ten.

** Chapter Ten. **

 

** Jared. **

 

The pain was so excruciating that Jared could barely think.  The silver was burning his face, shutting out everything else.  Jared felt a hand stroke through his hair and knew that it was Jensen; he did the only thing that he could, Jared wrapped his arm around his mate and pulled him closer.  It helped; knowing that Jensen was there with him. 

 

He snarled when he felt Jensen go limp beside him just before his mate was torn away from him.  Jared lifted his head, squinting even in the dim light; his eyes were barely able to make out the blurry figures in front of him.  Jared growled; this man had not only dared to take Jensen away from him once, he’d taken him away a second time.  If he was the reason that Jensen hadn’t come back to Jared, all these years, then there would be no place on earth that Jared wouldn’t find him and make him pay. 

 

Jared heard cruel laughter above him from where he was still crouched on the ground, ‘That’s silver, you son of a bitch.  I fucking know what you are and you better stay the hell away from me and my _husband_ if you don’t want to find yourself on the wrong end of a silver bullet.’  Jared groaned at the sharp kick to his abdomen but the pain barely even registered given the agony already coursing through his body from the raw blisters littering his skin.  Jared heard movement close by and he knew that the man was taking his mate away and, right then, there was nothing that Jared could do to stop him. 

 

Jared scrambled to his feet, in an attempt to follow, but his head wasn’t clear enough to catch his mate’s scent.  So Jared changed direction and, haphazardly, made his way back to the bar to find Chad.  Jared stumbled through the bar, ignoring the shocked gasps of the other patrons; he didn’t care if this made the front page tomorrow, not when Jensen was getting further away with every moment that passed. 

 

‘Jared!  _Jesus_ , man, what the hell happened?’  Chad shocked voice filtered through the general clamour of the bar.

 

‘Jensen…it _was_ Jensen, Chad.’  Jared replied, placing a hand on Chad’s shoulder to support himself; with the shock and relief of finding his mate alive, losing him again, and _then_ getting a face full of silver…Jared was feeling somewhat less than steady.

 

‘Jay…’  Even though Jared couldn’t make out Chad’s face, he knew that the man was giving him that same sympathetic expression that he always did when the subject of Jensen arose.

 

Jared tightened his grip on the other man’s shoulder slightly.  ‘No Chad, you don’t understand.  I saw him, I _touched_ him.  He was out in the alley, and he…he’s got a husband now.’

 

‘He’s got a _what?!’_ Chad asked, anger clear in the man’s voice.  Chad may’ve been one of the wolves that believed that Jensen was gone, probably dead, even though he’d, wisely, never voiced that thought to Jared but he’d obviously never entertained the idea that Jensen had left them all to live a human life like some of the other wolves had.  ‘That _son of a bitch.’_

 

‘No, no.’  Jared had to make Chad understand, but they were losing time.  ‘No, Chad, he didn’t know me, I don’t think he remembered me.’  Jared explained; his voice filled with grief at the idea that his mate didn’t know him, that his mate had given himself to someone else.  ‘He looked terrified when my eyes turned yellow, I…I don’t think he knows what he is, Chad.’

 

‘How could he not?  We change on the full moon, Jay, it would be damn near impossible for him _not_ to know.’  Chad queried, somewhat sceptically; he obviously still thought that Jensen had just run off and left Jared for someone else.

 

‘There was a silver ring on his finger.  Do you think that would be enough to stop it?  Enough to stop the change?’  Jared asked; the ring had been bothering since the moment he saw it and not just because it had replaced the bronze one that he’d given Jensen. 

 

Jared could just about make out Chad’s head nodding; his eyes were already starting to heal from the silver.  ‘Could do, especially if Jensen wasn’t _trying_ to shift, ‘cause then all the silver would be counteracting would be the pull of the moon.  Yeah, I think that _could_ probably do it.’  Chad paused, passing a hand through his short blonde hair, ‘Do you think that’s what this is?  That this _husband_ of his knows that Jen’s a werewolf and hasn’t told him?’

 

‘Yeah, I fucking do.  He hit me with silver and knocked Jen out.  We have to go after them - now, Chad.’  He pulled at Chad’s arm, dragging the shorter man off of his bar stool.

 

‘Hey, wait, we need to get you cleaned up first…’

 

‘No, I have to…’

 

‘Jay you can barely see, man, you can’t go after Jensen like that.  Let me get you to Sandy; she can get all that silver off your skin, you’ll heal faster that way.   She can clean your wounds and you’ll be as good as new in a couple of hours.  Plus, it’ll let us all calm down a bit so you can think straight enough to make a plan.’

 

‘Don’t need a fucking plan; just gonna rip the bastard’s head off and _carry_ Jensen back home if I have to.’  Jared growled.

 

‘Right, while that sounds awesome and _completely_ illegal, how are we going to find them again?’  Chad asked, sarcasm colouring his tone.

 

Jared scowled, or as much as he could with his swollen eyes; it came out as more of a squint but he felt that the rest of his body language probably communicated his feelings perfectly to his best friend. 

 

‘Okay.  We just need to slow down and think for a minute.  You saw the bastard right?’  Jared nodded.  ‘Well, you can go to the station, here in Chicago, and have a look in the database, see if he’s in there so we can get his address.  _Then_ we can barge in, rip off heads, kidnap Jensen yadayadayayda,’  He waved his hand in the air to indicate the rest of the plan.  Jared liked that plan, he liked it a lot.

 

‘You’re right, Chad, get me to Sandy; I’m getting my mate back, tonight. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/34095.html#cutid1)

 


	11. Chapter Eleven.

** Chapter Eleven. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jensen opened his eyes gingerly, his head was thumping painfully.  He sat up on the bed and rubbed at the back of his skull, trying to ease away the ache.  He was shocked when his hand came back slightly sticky.  Jensen brought his hand up to this face and found blood smeared across his fingers.  What the hell had happened?

 

The last thing he remembered was kneeling down next to the stranger and running a hand through the man’s hair.  

 

_Jensen smiled warmly as he stared up into the man’s face and ran a hand through his hair, brushing it out of the man’s hazel eyes._

 

The scene was so clear but Jensen couldn’t remember doing it.  Maybe it had been a dream that he’d had; the stranger in the alley had been just like Jensen’s fantasy man so maybe he’d just made the image up.  All those flashes might just have been his overactive imagination placing the handsome man’s face on that of his mystery lover.

 

The door opened abruptly and Jeff rushed in, holding two suitcases in his hands.  He threw one at Jensen, who just barely managed to catch it before it fell to the floor.  ‘Get your shit packed.’

 

‘What…?’

 

Jeff stopped tossing his clothes into his own suitcase and moved close to where Jensen was still sitting on the bed.  Jensen leaned back, away from the looming man.  ‘I said.  Get.  Your.  Shit.  Packed.’

 

‘No.’  _Not until I got some kind of explanation, for this…for the alley…for the blood on my head._   The backhand that he should have received in the alley landed across Jensen’s cheek, jerking his head to the side so hard that Jensen was afraid that he might throw up.  It confirmed his suspicion that he had a concussion from the earlier injury though, _Jesus_ , had Jeff really hit him _that_ hard just to get him back home? 

 

Why on earth was Jeff so scared of that guy?

 

Was it because of what Jensen had seen?  The yellow eyes?  The _teeth_?  The almost  savage noises that the man had made?

 

‘Jeff…’

 

‘Jensen, you _really_ don’t want to make me mad right now.’  The threat was obvious in the man’s voice but there was something in Jensen, screaming at him, that he couldn’t go with Jeff.  That he couldn’t leave the house, not until…

 

When Jensen didn’t make a move towards his open suitcase, Jeff sighed and stormed up to the bed, ‘I _told_ you but you never fucking listen.’  Jeff grabbed Jensen’s wrists and pulled the silver handcuffs from his pocket.  Jensen struggled and tried to pull his hands away.

 

‘No!  No!  Stop it!  Let go!’  It did no good; he felt weak and nauseous and Jeff had the distinct advantage of being stood over him.  The cuffs closed around Jensen’s wrists and the nausea doubled.  Then Jeff was practically dragging him across the floor, the carpet chafing the skin of his knees, to the door of the house.  Jeff all but threw him into the back seat of his jaguar before locking all the doors and disappearing back into the house, leaving Jensen trapped inside. 

 

Half an hour later, Jeff was in the front seat talking on his cell,

 

‘Yeah, just get your asses down here, this is what I pay you for.’…‘I’m gonna need some help with that little problem that I told you about.’…‘Yeah, I know, can’t believe it actually happened either.’…‘Yeah, it’s worth it.’… ‘No, don’t you _fucking_ argue with me, I pay your fucking wages.  Now get your ass down here.’  Jeff threw the phone down on the front seat and started the car.  He started to reverse out the drive but then the car just stopped. 

 

Jensen tried to look up through the tinted windows but lying face down, on his stomach, limited his vision somewhat.

 

‘What the fuck…’  Jeff looked around, pressing his foot down fully on the accelerator.  Jensen could hear the wheels turning on the tarmac but the car still refused to move.  

 

‘Get out the car, Morgan.’  A voice ordered from outside of the car, and Jensen instantly recognised it - it was the man from the alley. 

 

_‘Come on, Jen, you have to get out of the car sometime.  Believe me, they’re gonna love you.’_

 

Another flash and Jensen buried his head in the leather seats of the car.  He felt like he was going crazy.

 

Desperate to see what was going on, Jensen flipped himself onto his back and managed to sit up.  The change of position made his stomach roil dangerously; he’d be in trouble if he threw up all over Jeff’s leather finish.

 

‘Stay the fuck down, Jensen.’  Morgan snarled from the front seat.  But Jensen ignored him; he wanted to see the man outside, he _needed_ to see him. 

 

Jensen pulled at the door handle, with his cuffed hands, but couldn’t get the door to open - fucking Jeff and his fucking child locks.  Frustrated, Jensen hit his hands hard against the glass of the window and saw the tall man turn his face to the sound.   He hit against the window again; he didn’t know what he was doing, he just knew that, for the first time in a long time, he was doing what he truly wanted. 

 

The man walked up to the window.

 

‘Move back, Jen.’  Jensen nodded and slid back across the seat and the man punched his fist through the window.  Jensen winced as he saw the cuts on the man’s hand, but the stranger’s hazel eyes never left Jensen’s face.  Jensen crawled across the seat as the man opened the door, only to be grabbed by a long forgotten Jeff as his husband reached into the back of the car.

 

‘Don’t even think about it.’  But Jensen pulled away; Jeff could hardly get a grip on him from that position so Jensen moved towards the taller man.  He reached out and took the man’s injured hands in his,

 

_‘You can’t keep doing this.’_

 

_‘I can.’_

 

_‘No, you can’t.  You’re only gonna get yourself in trouble.’_

 

_‘Like I care about that.  Jen, all I care about is that you’re safe.’_

 

The flash was so vivid that Jensen could feel the fond smile from his vision sneak onto his face.  He stroked over the man’s bruised knuckles.

 

‘I know you, don’t I?’  Jensen said, looking up into the stunning hazel eyes of the stranger.  ‘I…I’m sorry…I just can’t…’

 

The man leaned down and kissed him

 

_Jared pushed Jensen down onto the bed, nipping across his jaw and down his neck.  ‘Jared.’  He groaned, lacing his fingers in the other man’s long brown hair._

 

_Jared surged back up his body, taking his lips in a passionate kiss as he ground his hard cock down into Jensen’s.  Jensen gasped into the kiss, letting himself get lost in the sensations thrumming through his body.  Letting himself get lost in Jared._

 

_‘So beautiful, baby.’  Jared mumbled against Jensen’s neck, as he licked a stripe up the skin, and laid a quick nip to the sensitive skin behind Jensen’s ear.  ‘So beautiful, Jensen.’_

 

Jensen gasped and his knees nearly gave out but the taller man, _Jared_ , was there to support him.  ‘It’s alright, I’ve got you.’

 

‘Jared,’ Jensen choked out.  ‘Jared.’  He said again, just because he could.  Flashes of his past, _years_ spent with the man in front of him, flickered before his eyes; images of his family, his friends, his life as a werewolf.  And none of it included Jeff, nothing before the last three years.  The man had lied to him…about everything. 

 

And Jensen had just believed him.

 

Jensen threw his arms around Jared’s neck and jumped into the man’s arms.  Jared grabbed Jensen’s thighs and held him up, as Jensen buried his face in Jared’s neck, breathing in his mate’s scent.  ‘I’m so sorry.  _Please_ , I’m sorry…’  Jensen shook his head, how could he have forgotten?  How could he possibly have forgotten Jared, the most important person in his life?  How could Jensen have given himself to someone else?  It made him sick to think about it and even sicker to think that maybe Jared wouldn’t want him back now. 

 

He felt one of Jared’s large hands stroking down his back, calming his sobs.   ‘It’s alright.  It’s okay, Jensen.  Please don’t cry.’  That only made Jensen cry harder; after three years of feeling lost and empty, he finally felt at home.  _Jared_ was his home. 

 

‘Jensen, get back in the car.’  Jensen’s head snapped up at the sound of Jeff’s voice, the man who’d kept him from Jared.  He snarled and turned to look over his shoulder at the other man, only to have his eyes widen at the sight of the gun in Jeff’s hand, aimed at Jensen.  ‘Get back in the car, Jensen…or I’ll shoot you.’ 

 

Jensen shook his head; he would die before he left Jared’s side again.  Jensen disentangled himself from Jared, even though it pained him to do so.  He stood up straight and pulled the burning silver ring off his finger and threw it at Jeff in answer.  Jensen had no obligation to this man, not like he’d thought he had; he didn’t owe him _anything_ , he had _never_ loved Jeff or made any kind of promises to him.  None of the reasons that Jensen had used, to convince himself to stay, remained.  All that was left was a deep hatred for the man who, knowingly, kept him from his mate. 

 

Jeff smirked at him, ‘Fine.’  He swung the gun to the left and aimed it at Jared instead, ‘Get in the car, Jensen, or I’ll shoot _him_.  And you know what a good shot I am.’  Jensen did; it was something that he’d always disliked about the man.  Jeff was a hunter; he had trophies all over his office wall as testament to his skills.  It made Jensen feel even worse now knowing that he, himself, was a wolf. 

 

Jensen swallowed nervously, looking from the gun to Jared and back again.  He couldn’t lose him, not again, and he would if Jared was shot.

 

If…if Jensen went with Jeff, he might be able to escape later. 

 

At that moment, a van screeched around the corner, barely avoiding hitting the other werewolves, as they stood frozen, staring at the gun that Jeff had aimed at Jared.  The van stopped next to Jeff’s jaguar and the driver’s door was flung open to reveal a burly, blonde man. 

 

‘Jensen.’  Jeff warned again, and Jensen took one last look at Jared, made his decision, and walked towards his fake husband. 

 

‘Jensen, no.’  Jared hissed, a hint of disbelief in his voice.

 

‘I have to, Jay.’  Jensen replied, sadly, but he felt safe in the knowledge that it was true.  ‘I’ll get away though, I promise.’  He ignored Jeff’s derisive snort from behind him.

 

The stocky man strode up to Jensen, turned him roughly, removed Jeff’s silver cuffs and placed a heavier set around his wrists.  Jeff kept the gun trained on Jared, the entire time, before the goon dragged Jensen over to the van. 

 

The man threw open the van’s back doors and Jensen gasped at what he saw inside.  A freaking cage!  It had thick silver bars framing its small interior.  The thug shoved Jensen inside and Jensen hissed as his skin made contact with the bars.  After shifting around a little, Jensen was able to settle himself in a ball, in the centre of the cage, as he desperately tried to keep his skin from touching the burning metal. 

 

This was not good.  The door of the cage was shut and locked with a silver padlock - a combination lock so Jensen wouldn’t even have the luxury of trying to pick it.  The van door closed as well, shrouding him in darkness. 

 

Oh.

 

** Jared. **

 

Jared gritted his teeth as he stared down the barrel of the gun aimed at him; he could feel the tension rolling off the wolves behind him, knowing that they were barely holding back from rushing Morgan as well. 

 

Jared couldn’t risk it, though, since the man seemed to know what they are - he _knew_ that they were werewolves.  Jared had no idea how the man had found out about their existence but Jared’s still tender face attested to the fact that he had.  So Jared knew that there were silver bullets in that gun and that he, Chad or Sandy would get one in his heart if they tried to save his mate.  And, if he died, there would be no-one to get Jensen back. 

 

The brawny man, who’d hauled Jensen away, returned to Morgan’s side, ‘It’s done, boss.’ 

 

Jared had quickly scanned Jeff Morgan’s file at the station and was certain about what the information indicated - drug trafficking.  Morgan was a doctor with one too many accusations and investigations of misconduct on his record; there had been numerous incidents of drugs going missing and countless patients claiming that the man had blackmailed them.  Even though Morgan had managed to escape conviction every time, Jared was certain that the man was 100% guilty.  And those weren’t the only crimes that Jared suspected the man was guilty of either. 

 

They just needed to find proof.  The man made too much money for a mere surgeon and his off shore accounts hinted at tax evasion.  It wasn’t too much of a stretch to assume that Morgan had gotten himself a couple of heavy duty body guards to deal with his less than savoury associates. 

 

‘You’re the Alpha, right?’  Jeff smirked at him, ‘’Cause there’s no way that boy isn’t a Beta, not with the way he was begging for it all the damn time.  Should have seen him in heat, _Alpha;_ the boy didn’t know what to do with himself; I helped him out though, don’t you worry.’  The mocking tone was enough to get Jared’s hackles up.     

 

Jared growled; no-one got to talk about Jensen like that…no-one.  And especially not the asshole who’d taken advantage of his mate for the last three years.

 

‘Bet you weren’t enough though were you Morgan?  Have a little trouble…satisfying Jensen?’  Jared got his answer as the man’s eyes hardened and his grip tightened on the gun.  Jared wasn’t overly worried - Morgan wouldn’t shoot him, not unless he had to - Jared was too good of a bargaining chip, to use against Jensen, to kill him just because he pissed Morgan off.  As much as the man would obviously like to. 

 

It was satisfying to know that even if Jensen’s mind hadn’t remembered that he was Jared’s mate, his body clearly had. 

 

‘Whatever.  He learnt once that he’s mine, he’ll learn again in time with the right…persuasion.’  A mixture of anger and fear flooded through Jared; he needed to get Jensen back right now.  ‘Well, see you round, Jared…or not.’

 

Jeff walked backwards to the van, his eyes not leaving Jared once, before he climbed into the driver seat.  As soon as the gun was lowered so that Jeff could start the vehicle, Jared sprang forwards only to be pulled back by Chad and Sandy.

 

‘No, Jay.  He still has the gun.’

 

‘But…’

 

‘No!  Jensen won’t thank you for getting yourself killed.  This way, at least, you’ll still be around to get him back, he’s gonna need you.’  Chad’s eyes strayed to the van, a shadow falling over his face.  Jared knew that Chad was right but he still didn’t feel anything but helpless as he watched the white van drive away with his mate, taking him away from Jared a third time.

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/34458.html#cutid1)

 


	12. Chapter Twelve.

** Chapter Twelve. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jensen felt the van come to an abrupt stop, sending him crashing against the silver bars of the cage and causing his skin to hiss and burn at the contact.  He flinched away and moved back to the centre of the cage.  Jensen crouched down low, ready to attack as soon as the door opened - he still had teeth, even if they were only his human ones. 

 

Jensen would die before he let Morgan lay a hand on him again; he’d already let the man tarnish him enough, probably too much for Jared to ever take him back.  Jensen blinked back the tears that sprung to his eyes at the thought; he couldn’t let himself get caught up in that now, he had to focus on getting free. 

 

The door of the van creaked open and Jensen bowed his head, in feigned submission, hoping that Jeff would think he was either subdued by the silver or his own sense of defeat. 

 

‘Oh sweetheart, don’t be like that; everything will be back to normal in no time.  I won’t even punish you for taking off my ring; you were confused that’s all.’  Jensen heard Jeff unlock the cage door and he leapt out, colliding hard with the man’s body.  Just before Jensen managed to bite down, a pair of strong arms wrapped around his chest and lifted him up and away, kicking and snarling.

 

Morgan got up and dusted himself off, ‘Well, _that_ was unexpected.’  He chuckled.  ‘Put him down, Kevin.’  Jensen was dumped, unceremoniously, on the floor but, before he could get up, a sharp shock passed through his whole body causing his muscles to lock up as he convulsed. 

 

Jeff knelt down next to him when the shocks finally stopped, leaving Jensen shaking and panting with his eyes closed and his cheek pressed to the cold floor, unable to move.  ‘You’ll do well to remember, Jensen, that I _own_ you.  I owned you before, when you didn’t know what you were, and I own you now.  Why do you think you seeing your mate changes that?’

 

Jensen continued to shiver and swallowed down the bile that rose to his throat.  God, he felt like he’d been hit by a train; he’d never felt more drained and weak in his life.

 

‘And, _Christ_ , what makes you think he even wants you back?  I’ve read about werewolf cultures - you let someone else have you, Jensen, another Alpha, doesn’t that mean that you rejected his claim?  Why would he take you back after that?’ 

 

‘B...b…but I didn’t…’  Jensen tried to argue that he hadn’t known about his werewolf life; that he hadn’t known about Jared.  If he had, he would never have gone with Jeff.

 

‘ _Really_ Jensen?  You sure?’  Jeff asked him, looking a little sceptical.  Well, _yeah_ , his relationship with Jeff had always seemed a little off, like something was missing, but Jensen hadn’t known that it was his _mate_ that he was missing.  How could he have?  How could he be blamed for that?  ‘Because I think you _knew,_ deep down, but went with it anyway.  Hell, I’m pretty sure that’s what Jared thinks; he could barely look at you today, and you didn’t see his face when you jumped at him like a fucking bitch in heat.’ 

 

Jensen flinched; Jensen hadn’t seen Jared’s face then and he certainly couldn’t have blamed his mate if he _had_ been disgusted; willingly or not, Jensen had given himself to someone else.  _Christ_ , he hadn’t even _tried_ to look for Jared. 

 

Jeff stroked a hand through Jensen’s short hair, the action a mockery of comfort, ‘He’s probably moved on, Alphas can do that right?  He was looking awfully cosy with that she-wolf back there when we drove off.’  Sandy?  Jared and Sandy?  They _had_ been best friends before Jensen had disappeared and they’d even dated before Jensen had moved to the town so maybe…if Sandy had been there to comfort Jared then maybe they…And maybe Jared was just trying to get Jensen back because…because he was such a good guy.  Jared really was; he cared about everyone in the pack - he could easily just have been trying to bring Jensen home to his family. 

 

Oh god!   _Had_ Jared moved on?  Because Jensen hadn’t!  Tucked up in Jared’s arms, he’d felt more at home than he had in a long time; Jensen didn’t think he would _ever_ be able to move on, even if Jared had. 

 

‘I know it seems unfair, Jensen, but sometimes we just have to accept what life throws at us.  What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.’  The man pulled Jensen to his feet and wound a possessive arm around his waist as he dragged him towards a small wooden cabin.  Jensen had just enough strength left to lift his head and take in his surroundings; they were in the middle of the woods, not a road, a house or another human being for miles.  Jensen gulped as Jeff hauled him across the threshold. 

 

The cabin was fully furnished.  How had Jensen not known that the man had this place?  How much did he know about the man that he’d called his husband for the last three years and how much of that was even been true?  The beefy guy, standing behind them, was an unpleasant addition to the picture that Jensen was now building of Jeff.  What on earth was Jeff mixed up in if he had a bodyguard on staff?

 

‘What…What are w…we doing h…h…here?’  Jensen stuttered out through his still slightly shaking teeth.

 

‘Getting to know each other all over again, babe.  We can get what we had back, I’m sure of it.’  Jeff said cheerfully.  But Jensen shook his head in denial; no, he didn’t want that, _hell_ , he hadn’t even really wanted it before when he’d had no memory of something, _someone_ , better and had actually thought that this man was his husband.  ‘Sorry, not up for discussion, Jensen, it’s for the best, you’ll see.’

 

‘W…Why?’  Why did Jeff still want to keep him here?  Why had Jeff lied and taken him in the first place?  And the most important question - _Why_ Jensen?

 

Jeff stopped and looked down at Jensen, affectionately stroking a stray hair away from his sweaty forehead; it was such a contrast to the situation that it made Jensen’s mind spin, ‘Because I saw something beautiful and I wanted it.’  He said simply.  Jensen shook his head again and tried to pull away only to be stopped by the formerly affectionate hand clamping down, hard, on the back of his neck, ‘And I always get what I want Jensen.  _Always_.’ 

 

Jeff used the hand on Jensen’s neck to direct him towards a door at the back of the cabin.  As soon as it opened, Jensen reared back; there was a rickety wooden staircase in front of them, leading down into darkness.  Jensen could smell the musty, dank emanating from the room; he really didn’t want to go down there. 

 

Jeff didn’t give him much of a choice though and a hard shove to his back nearly sent Jensen careering down the stairs head first; it was only Jeff’s firm grip on his neck that saved him from falling.  The threat was obvious - Jensen was going into that basement, either by his own volition or Jeff was going to push him in and Jensen would get a couple of broken bones along with it.  But the end result would be the same – Jensen would still be in the basement. 

 

Jensen took a tentative step forwards, onto the first wooden stair, not feeling at all reassured by the resounding creek that the material groaned out or the ‘Good boy,’ whispered in his ear.  He wanted to tell Jeff where he could stick his ‘good boys’ but Jensen was very aware of Jeff’s continued hold on his neck.  Jensen wanted to stay mobile and injury-free for as long as possible; it would increase his chances of escape, when the opportunity arose, if he wasn’t nursing a couple of broken bones, even if they would only take a short time to heal. 

 

Jensen made slow progress down the rickety staircase with Jeff descending right behind him.  It was difficult to keep his balance with his body still suffering the after-effects of the Taser blast but, at least, every time he stumbled, Jeff caught him around the arm and steadied him.  Jensen finally made it down the stairs in one piece.

 

A soft light flickered on, illuminating the still dim room.  Oh hell no.  There was another cage; it was similar to the one in the van, only this one was larger and there were blankets and a few bottles of water on the floor.  He wasn’t _staying_ in a cage.

 

‘In.’  Jeff ordered as he nodded towards the open door of the cage.

 

‘No.’  Jensen said immediately, not caring if it got him a beating; he wasn’t an animal, despite what Jeff might think.

 

Jeff sighed, ‘Why are you making everything so fucking difficult?  Just get in the fucking cage Jensen.  You won’t have to be in there all the time; it’s just for when I’m busy.  When I’m here at the cabin, you’ll be upstairs, with me, in my room.’  And _that_ didn’t sound much better to Jensen, actually the cage was starting to look much more inviting now; he was pretty sure that Jeff wouldn’t lower himself to enter the cage at any rate. 

 

But the cage looked impenetrable; there would be no chance for Jensen to escape whilst he was in there, not with the silver bars and the chains on the floor which Jeff clearly intended to attach to his wrists.  Yeah, that was going to be _really_ comfortable. 

 

Jensen didn’t move; he might _have_ to go into the cage but he’d be damned if he would walk in himself.  Jeff came up behind him and shoved him through the door; Jensen stumbled and landed hard on his front, scraping his cheek on the rough concrete floor.  Jensen felt the heavy duty, non-silver cuffs pulled off his wrists an instant before Jeff closed his own silver pair back around them.  Jensen closed his eyes and breathed through the familiar effect of the silver, at least now he knew what the nausea meant.  

 

Jensen heard something click behind him and, once Jeff had hauled him up to his knees, he realised that a long silver chain connected his wrists to the rings at the centre of the floor.  ‘As soon as you start acting more like yourself again then I’ll cuff your hands in front of you - that should be more comfortable.  But for now, sweetheart, you’re gonna stay like that and maybe it’ll help you reconsider the way you’ve been behaving.’ 

 

With that, Jeff left the cage and closed the silver door with a resounding CLANG.  Jensen didn’t like how final that sounded. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/34581.html#cutid1)

 


	13. Chapter Thirteen.

** Chapter Thirteen.  **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jeff left the silver cuffs on Jensen’s wrists as he pushed him down onto the soft bed, knowing that they were the only things stopping Jensen shifting and ripping the man apart.  After days of lying and sleeping on hard concrete, the bed should have been a nice change…it wasn’t.   Jensen recoiled and tried to roll off the bed.  The backhand stung his cheek, ‘Jensen.  Stop it.  Or I’ll tie you down and let a couple of my friends, out there, have a go too.’  Jeff snarled.

 

Jensen instantly went limp; there wouldn’t be much that he’d be able to do to defend himself if Jeff chose to handcuff him to the bed, the silver made him as weak as a newborn kitten.  He closed his eyes and tried to take himself away.  Jensen purposely didn’t think of Jared, like he had all those other times even if he hadn’t known it then; he wasn’t going to taint Jared with any of this.  This was Jensen’s pain to bear, his punishment for being so stupid; Jared was pure and perfect and nothing that happened in this room would touch him. 

 

‘That’s it, sweetheart.  Give yourself to your Alpha.’  Jensen snarled before he could stop himself, his safe haven crumbling away at the sound of the other man’s voice.  He clenched his hands into fists; this man was _not_ his Alpha, he wasn’t an Alpha at all.  Jensen kept his mouth shut, though, hoping to get this over as soon as possible.  But he couldn’t help the instinctual flinch as Jeff ran his hands down Jensen’s sides and across his abdomen; soft gentle touches, obviously trying to unbalance Jensen.   

 

Jensen yelped and his eyes snapped open when he felt a slick finger prod at his entrance.  He felt tears flood his eyes; it was so much worse than he’d thought it would be.  It was so much worse than before because, even though he might not have wanted it then, now he felt like he was actually cheating on his mate.  His mind screamed out in horror and disgust at what he was allowing to happen; his body crying out for his mate and not the imposter on top of him.   Just as the third slick finger slid into him, the door burst open.

 

‘Boss, you’re needed.’

 

‘I’m _fucking_ busy,’ Jeff gritted out, his focus still completely on Jensen as he tried to keep himself still under Jeff’s roaming hands.

 

‘I know, Sir, but it’s really important - there’s a problem with the shipment…the FBI…’  The man babbled slightly, clearly Jensen wasn’t the only one afraid of Jeff.

 

‘Shit!  Can’t you fucking idiots do anything right?’  Jeff huffed, but, _thankfully,_ he withdrew his fingers and leaned over to lay a kiss on Jensen’s lips, ‘Be back soon babe.’  Jensen breathed out a sigh of relief as Jeff climbed off the bed, ‘Watch him.’   Jeff spat at the guard and pushed passed him but Jensen didn’t miss the way the other man’s eyes flickered over his body, for just a moment, before the guard tightened his jaw and looked away. 

 

Jensen could work with that.  Jensen wiped his face on the pillow, getting rid of the tear tracks running down his cheeks, then propped himself up on the bed.  He hoped that he was striking a seductive pose; he’d never really had to do that before, Jared had always known what he’d wanted and just taken it so Jensen hadn’t had to seduce him at all.  It obviously had some kind of effect because the guard walked over to the window, putting as much distance between himself and Jensen as possible.

 

Jensen let his head fall back and moaned loudly, letting his hips pump up slightly on the bed.  He pushed his embarrassment aside as his hard cock thrust into the air, the cock ring keeping him hard despite his adverse feelings about the whole situation.  The man turned back to him, his bottom lip caught between his teeth and indecision written all over his face.  This was the moment, Jensen could have him here.

 

Jensen turned his bright green eyes on the man, caught his gaze and murmured a soft ‘ _Please’_ as he fell back against the soft bed.  The man was across the room and on lying on top of Jensen in an instant.

 

‘You are so fucking beautiful.’  The man whispered, with awe, as he trailed a hand down Jensen’s face.  As the guard’s gaze dropped to Jensen chest and he began to slide his hand down Jensen’s body, Jensen took his chance.   He brought his head up hard and butted it against the man’s on top of him.  Pain exploded through his own head but at least, when he opened his eyes, the man on top of him was unconscious. 

 

Jensen quickly eased himself out from under the man’s larger body and hobbled over to the wardrobe.  He thanked God that Jeff had cuffed his wrists in front of him this time as he grabbed a pair of sweats and a jumper inside.  The clothes were all Jeff’s; that sent a chill through Jensen, clearly he was meant to spend all his time just in his boxers at the cabin. 

 

The clothes were, therefore, slightly too large but that certainly didn’t give him the warm feeling that he usually got when he wore Jared’s too big clothes - he used to love that.  And so did Jared.  Still, it was better than nothing and he didn’t want to risk waking the man on the bed by trying to steal his clothes.  Although, he did steal the wallet that was bulging out of the man’s front pocket; it was easy enough to get at without risking the man stirring awake.

 

Dressed and ready and making sure that he still had the leather pouch that he always carried with him, Jensen opened the window.  It wasn’t a huge drop, especially not for a werewolf, but he couldn’t guarantee that it wasn’t going to hurt. 

 

Jensen took a deep breath and jumped down, landing squarely on two feet.  He felt something twinge in his knee but took off at a run all the same.  He just had to get to somewhere with a phone.  _Anywhere_.  He just hoped that Jared hadn’t changed his number. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/34936.html#cutid1)

 


	14. Chapter Fourteen.

** Chapter Fourteen. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

It had been several hours since Jensen had made his escape; the sun was beginning to set and night was creeping in.  That didn’t bother Jensen in the slightest, he’d grown up in the woods, no, what bothered him was that he was no closer to civilisation and he was sure that Jeff was aware of his flight by then. 

 

Jensen had tried to get the handcuffs off his wrists but it was just too difficult with his hands held so close together.  So Jensen was forced to stay human which meant that his progress took about three times as long as it would have in his lupine form.

 

Not only that, but he also couldn’t take advantage of his werewolf senses to their full capacity when he was human.  Jensen was sure that he would’ve been able to smell a human settlement were he a wolf.  Still he trudged on.

 

Sometime later, he heard rustling in the trees and voices to his left.  Jensen threw himself down to the ground, thanking God that he’d chosen an all black ensemble from Jeff’s wardrobe.  He held himself completely still, not moving an inch; Jensen was trained as a hunter and he was good at it.  Where Jensen lacked Jared’s strength and power, he had a remarkable talent for both stealth and speed.  They wouldn’t find him, not unless they actually fell over his body, Jensen was sure of it. 

 

‘Shit!  Morgan’s doing his nut.  I can’t believe he blew Morris away like that, that was cold; Morris had worked for him for years.  _Jesus_.  And all for some fucking whore.’  Jensen heard a harsh voice spit out in the dark, the words loud in the quiet of the forest.  He cringed when he heard that the man had died because of his escape but consoled himself with the fact that, if the man worked for someone like Jeff, then he clearly couldn’t have been a good guy. 

 

‘I know, let’s just find the little bitch and hope we get to keep our heads in all this.  Hell, we might even get a reward if we find him.’  A second voice answered, his tone laced with excitement.

 

‘Wouldn’t count on it, not after the fuck up at the warehouse yesterday.   Morgan’s looking for a leak and you better just pray that he doesn’t think it’s you.  Morgan doesn’t care all that much about evidence; he’ll blow you away as soon as look at you if he even _suspects_ that you sold him out.  Seen it happen, man.’  Jensen listened wide-eyed; Jeff was so much more ruthless than Jensen had ever imagined. 

 

Shipment?  Did that mean drugs?  Slave trafficking?  Illegal organs?  Every possibility was pretty gruesome.  He felt even dirtier than before knowing that he’d let that bastard touch him, knowing that he’d told Jeff that he loved him, even if it hadn’t meant it. 

 

‘Christ!  Come on; the faster we look, the faster we’ll find him.  I _really_ don’t wanna go back to the Boss without his skinny ass.’

 

Jensen heard the voices drift away, back into the shadows, and let out the breath that he’d been holding.  Jensen briefly wondered how many teams of men Jeff had sent out to look for him and then pushed the thought aside – _one_ was too many. 

 

Jensen wasn’t sure how he felt about the screw up at the warehouse; on the one hand, it was obviously keeping Jeff distracted and it _had_ allowed his escape in the first place but it also meant that, if Jensen _was_ found, Jeff was likely to take his frustrations out on him which certainly wasn’t good.  Jensen shook off those morose thoughts and decided to go with the warehouse problem being a good thing; he’d probably still be being fucked by Jeff had it not happened so, yeah, definitely a good thing. 

 

Two hours later, Jensen was dirty and hungry and on his last legs.  It had gotten dark hours ago and he was close to giving up.  Just as his knees hit the cold, hard ground, he saw it - a light flickering in the trees.  He hauled himself back up and broke into a sprint.  Jensen found that the light was coming from a small town, the only one that Jensen had seen all day, and he sent up a silent thanks to whatever deity was listening. 

 

Jensen smoothed his hair down and tried to straighten out his scruffy clothes.  He hid the cuffs under his too long sleeves; the last thing he needed was for someone to think he was an escaped convict or something. 

 

Jensen looked around furtively; he was sure that Jeff would have people there, if this was indeed the only settlement in the area.  He couldn’t see anyone on the streets, as he darted between the shadows, making his way to the lone payphone at the end of the street.  That didn’t mean there wasn’t anyone there though.

 

Slipping inside, Jensen picked up the receiver and dialled Jared’s old number, praying that it was still in service.

 

‘Padalecki.’  Jared’s tone was short, clearly annoyed, but it was still the best sound that Jensen had ever heard.

 

‘Jay.’  Jensen breathed out, feeling tears choke him. 

 

‘Jen, is that you?’  The irritation instantly left the man’s voice, replaced by urgency and concern.  ‘Where are you?’

 

‘I…I don’t know.’  Jensen answered, his mind swimming and his close-kept control finally giving out now that he’d actually spoken to Jared.  He knew that Jared would take care of everything, just like he always did.

 

‘Okay, Jen, it’s okay.’  Jared soothed, ‘Just have a look round for me.  Can you see any signs, anything that might tell me where you are?’  Jensen turned round in the booth, peering out into the night.  He read the names of the shops carefully, ‘Dave’s Tools’, ‘Linda’s Diner’, ‘The Dog and Doe’ and then…‘Silver Creek Inn’.

 

‘Silver Creek, Jared.  I think I’m somewhere called Silver Creek.’  Jensen answered quickly, hoping that he was right.

 

‘That’s great, Jen.  We know from your number that you’re in Georgia and we’re looking up Silver Creek on the map.  I’m coming to get you, Jen; I’m only an hour away, just hold on.’  Jensen could hear Jared shuffling around, getting his things together, and talking to whoever was with him, probably Chad and Sandy. 

 

Sandy?  It wasn’t what Jensen should have been thinking about right then but he was exhausted and he just couldn’t fight the images that flew through his mind or the hurt that stung in his chest.  ‘Just find somewhere to hide till we get there, okay.  I’m coming for you, Jensen.’

 

‘Okay.’  Jensen replied softly, hanging up the phone and leaving the booth, feeling a little less hopeful than he had when Jared had first picked up the phone.

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/35091.html#cutid1)

 


	15. Chapter Fifteen.

** Chapter Fifteen.  **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jensen pushed open the door of the booth and dashed into a side alley just in time to hide from the people walking out of the Sherriff’s station.  It was Jeff, one of his goons, the Sherriff and his Deputy, ‘He’s my husband and he’s not well.’  Jeff slipped something into the Sherriff’s palm, no doubt a wad of cash; that wouldn’t be too surprising of the Jeff he was coming to know.  ‘I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone about this, I don’t want it getting out, you know.  I’ll just take him home; he’ll be fine as soon as he’s back with me.’ 

 

Jensen almost snorted from his hiding place; he could guarantee that he would be anything _but_ fine if he ever found himself back with Jeff, especially after this little stunt.  Jeff clearly didn’t like working with the authorities so Jensen was sure that he wouldn’t get off lightly if he was captured. 

 

Jeff and his man headed off in one direction and the Sheriff and his Deputy went in the other.  Jensen backed further into the shadows, looking for somewhere better to take cover in whilst he waited for Jared to find him. 

 

Jensen found an old mansion that definitely looked like it had seen better days; a sign outside stated that it as a museum of local history - damn small towns, how much history could there be in this shithole of a place anyway?  Unnecessary or not, the museum served Jensen’s purpose perfectly since the bottom window was slightly cracked.  Jensen pushed at the weak glass, hoping to make as little noise as possible as it broke under the force.  Jensen slipped in through the window, hissing as he cut his hand open in the process.   It was a small price to pay if he found somewhere safe inside.

 

Jensen quickly mounted the stairs to the second floor and walked into one of the larger rooms.  Inside was a strange assortment of items; a weird looking three legged table, an old cart, a few vases but what really caught Jensen’s attention was an old wooden wardrobe standing at the other end of the room.  It was placed against the wall and the plaque beside it proclaimed that it had belonged to the founder of Silver Lake. 

 

Jensen climbed into the wardrobe and closed the door quietly.  He sunk to the floor and rested his head on his knees, listening carefully for any sounds outside. 

 

Jensen didn’t know how long he’d sat there but when he heard a creak outside the doors, he lifted his head up and found that his neck stiff and a little painful.  A while then.  Maybe he’d fallen asleep?   He stayed absolutely still, not even breathing, unsure as to whether if it was a friend or foe in the room.

 

Jensen got his answer when the door swung open and he saw Jeff looking down at him, smirking, ‘Hey there, sweetheart, now what _am_ I going to do with you?’  The tone was teasing but Jensen could hear the anger lacing the words.  He cringed back…no, no… _Jared_ was meant to find him first, he was _meant_ to be here.  Jensen just had to wait and Jared would come – he promised.

 

Jeff pulled out a long silver knife and held it out towards him as Jensen shrank back against the wardrobe wall.  ‘Now enough of that now; I’ve had a _really_ long day.  Get the hell up, we’re going home.’

 

‘You might wanna put that down Morgan.’  Jeff whirled round and Jensen’s eyes darted across the room.  Jared stood in the centre of the room, his gun trained on Jeff and his eyes as hard as steel.  Jensen didn’t think he’d ever seen anything sexier in his life.  ‘You know what you said about your aim?  I can guarantee you that _mine_ is better.’  The gun clicked in emphasis. 

 

Jeff smiled, but dropped the knife to the floor and held his hands up in mock surrender.  ‘You won’t kill me, Padalecki, you’re one of the ‘good guys’.  Jeff even made air quotation marks with his fingers, the ass. 

 

Jensen saw Jeff’s grin falter as a sly smile grew on Jared’s face, even though his eyes remained cold, ‘You’re right, I won’t.  But you’d be surprised what you can live through.’

 

Jensen’s felt a pang of satisfaction when he saw Jeff’s jaw tighten at the words; the man might enjoy inflicting pain but suffering it…not so much.

 

‘Come on, Jen, we’re leaving,’ Jared held out his gun free hand to Jensen and the Beta stood up and walked passed Jeff to Jared.  Jared took Jensen’s hand in his and lowered his gun, confident that Jeff would realise that Jared could draw his gun faster than Jeff could get over to them with the knife.

 

‘This isn’t over, Padalecki.  Wherever you go, I’ll find you.  I have a _lot_ of powerful friends; I’ll get him back, trust me on that.’  Jensen tensed, he could well believe that threat.

 

Jared just chuckled and turned back to face the older man, pushing Jensen slightly behind his large body.  ‘Oh, believe me, I know all about your _friends,_ Morgan.  And I know all about the drugs you’ve been stealing, the organs you’ve been trading, and I _also_ know about Jennifer Beadle and Maria Leah.’

 

Jeff paled slightly more with every word.  Jensen had no idea who Jennifer Beadle and Maria Leah were but from Jeff’s reaction to their names, Jensen knew that something bad had happened to them.  Jared paused for a moment, obviously letting Jeff process that information before continuing, ‘And if you come near Jensen or me again, or I even _suspect_ that one of your _‘_ friends’ has come near us, I’ll make sure to find out _every_ last thing about you; I’m sure there’s _so_ much more to know about you, Morgan.   I’ll make sure you _never_ see the light of day again.  If you don’t, and you leave us alone, I’ll hide this stuff under so much paperwork that the bureau will need a forklift to find it, deal?’ 

 

Jensen could see the tension in his mate; he knew how difficult it must have been for Jared to make that deal; it went against everything that the man believed in.  That he’d done that _for_ Jensen, well, Jensen wasn’t sure how he felt about that right then; he felt terribly guilty for being so stupid as to get Jared caught up in this mess but also incredibly happy that Jared obviously still cared about him even if…even if he didn’t want him back as his mate.

 

Jeff’s eyes narrowed and flickered to the silver blade at his feet, just for a moment, before he reluctantly accepted that he was beaten.  He nodded stiffly and Jared nodded back; a silent handshake between two adversaries.  Jared turned back to Jensen and, since he was still holding Jensen’s hand, led him to the door.

 

****

 

Jensen sat quietly in the passenger seat of Jared’s impala; it looked new and expensive, Jared had driven an old, beaten up truck before.  His fingers were still entwined with Jared’s and he wondered if that meant anything since Jared had always been a very tactile person, regardless of whom he was with.  He shot a quick look at Sandy, who was sitting in the back seat, to see if she was looking at their linked hands. 

 

She wasn’t. 

 

Jensen looked back up at Jared; he couldn’t feel anything coming off the other man but then, maybe, he just couldn’t feel Jared as strongly as he’d been able to before if Jared had drifted away from him.  After a few moments, Jared turned to look at him, concern written all over his face as he gripped Jensen’s hand tighter. 

 

No-one said anything the whole ride back and Jensen almost couldn’t handle the guilt and worry weighing down on him.  He’d never heard of a werewolf cheating on their mate before - he would be the first.  _Hell_ , Jensen was sure that he wouldn’t even be allowed back into the pack after the Pack Alpha found out what he’d done.  

 

As soon as the car stopped, Jared unlinked their hands and jumped out of the car.  Jensen felt the loss like a limb; he’d never wanted to let go out that hand again.  He started when his door opened and Jared leaned in to take his hand again. 

 

‘I thought we’d go and see your folks first; they’ve missed you like crazy since you’ve been gone.’  Jensen winced, wondering what his parents knew about his time away, wondering what they must think of him, ‘Stop worrying Jen, they love you, they’ll _always_ love you.’  Jensen nodded dumbly.

 

‘Oh my God, Jenny.’  They heard a shocked voice behind them.  A moment later, Jensen found himself wrapped up in a pair of strong arms and his face buried in thick brown hair.  ‘I knew it.  I fucking knew you’d come back.’  Chris whispered in his ear, ‘We never gave up, we never stopped looking.’  Jensen was sure that he felt tears soaking into his shirt but he didn’t mention it; he was dangerously close to tears himself.

 

‘Hey, Chris.  Sorry for making you worry.’  He said quietly.

 

‘Don’t be sorry Jen.  I’m just glad you’re back.’  Chris smiled up at Jared and nodded to the taller man, sharing something that Jensen wasn’t privy to.  ‘I’m sure your mom and dad wanna see you so I’ll let you go, but you and Jared should come round to Kane’s tonight.’  A low growl from Jared had Chris backpedalling though, ‘Or…maybe not.’ 

 

Disappointment churned low in Jensen’s gut; if Jared didn’t even want to be seen out with Jensen, then it was even worse than he’d imagined.  Maybe, Jared really had mated with Sandy and she didn’t even want them to be friends anymore.  The sick feeling from the car came back full force and stole Jensen’s breath away. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/35516.html#cutid1)

 


	16. Chapter Sixteen.

** Chapter Sixteen. **

 

** Jared. **

 

Jared didn’t know what was wrong; he could feel the tension rolling off his mate in waves.  He knew that Jensen wouldn’t want to talk about it, not in front of other people, so all that Jared could do was send calming thoughts to his mate and try to anchor him by holding his hand; that had always worked in the past, although they’d never quite been through anything like this before.

 

He couldn’t help the growl that broke free when Chris invited them out Jensen’s first night back; as if Jared wanted to do anything but spend the night with his mate; as if he wanted to share Jensen with anyone.  Had it not been for the utter despair that Jensen’s parents had displayed when Jensen first had gone missing, Jared would’ve been taking Jensen straight home to see what was bothering him. 

 

‘Right, we’ll see you soon Chris okay.’  Jared dismissed the shorter man and pulled Jensen, gently, towards his parents’ house.  Jared knocked softly; he and the Ackles’ had a strained relationship since Jensen’s disappearance; they’d wanted Jared to stop looking, and let Jensen rest in peace, and Jared had told them that he knew that his mate was alive and had they been better parents they would’ve still been looking for him.  Neither party had meant the harsh words they’d said, both too strung out from grief and loss to think clearly. 

 

The door was opened almost immediately and there, in the doorway, stood Jensen’s mom. 

 

She pulled his mate into a tight hug, ‘Oh baby, I…I can’t believe you’re home.  Where have you been?  Why did you leave us?’  Donna asked, stroking a hand through Jensen’s hair.  Jared didn’t miss the flinch that ran through his mate and he was finally able to identify the overriding emotion coursing through Jensen’s body – guilt - and the feeling only intensified as he was held in his mother’s arms. 

 

‘I’m sorry mom.  It wasn’t…I didn’t…there was…’  Jensen fumbled for an answer, evidently searching for the words to make this all alright again.  Unfortunately for Jensen, Jared was sure that there were none, not after everything his Beta had suffered.

 

‘Look, Donna, can we talk about this another time, after Jensen’s gotten settled in a bit?’  It wasn’t really a question; mother-in-law or not, she was hurting his mate and Jared wouldn’t let that slide, especially not when Jensen was already in such a vulnerable state. 

 

‘What the hell?!  Jensen?  Is that _Jensen?_ ’  Jared heard Jensen’s Dad call from down the corridor; he and the other Alpha had nearly come to blows, several times, over the past few years.  The older man had been so angry at Jensen for running off and causing so much pain to the family. 

 

Jared knew that Alan loved his son but he could feel the fury radiating off the older man, right then, and there was no way that Jared was going to let him unleash that on Jensen. 

 

‘Yeah…hi dad.’  Jensen said weakly, cowering slightly under the rage pouring off the Alpha of his family. 

 

‘Where the hell have you been boy?  Your mother’s been worried sick and what about Mac, huh?  Did you even stop to think about _them_ while you were off doing whatever the hell you were doing?’  The man added scathingly, ‘I hope you enjoyed yourself.’  Jared growled low in his throat; a warning to the older Alpha that he better back off if he didn’t want Jared to make him.  There were advantages to being six foot five and a trained FBI agent and being able to protect his mate was definitely one of them.

 

‘Alan, stop.  None of that matters, he’s home now.’  Donna said soothingly, stroking a hand down Jensen’s cheek. 

 

‘Yeah but for how long?’  Alan shot back, turning narrowed eyes on Jensen, before huffing and heading for the door.  But just before the Alpha crossed the threshold, he stopped and looked over his shoulder at Jensen.  ‘You should leave; you obviously didn’t think we were good enough for you before so you don’t deserve to be a part of this family now.’

 

The pain that exploded from his mate was almost enough to floor Jared; the only thing that stopped him from throwing Alan through the wall was a gentle, restraining hand on his arm.

 

Donna turned beseeching eyes on her son, begging him not to leave again despite what his father had just said.  Jared desperately wanted to tell them that it hadn’t been Jensen’s fault, none of it.  But the story wasn’t his to tell and Jensen had had enough choices taken away from him, in the last few years, that Jared just couldn’t bring himself to take this decision away from him too.  ‘Don’t worry about him, sweetheart.  He’ll calm down; he was just worried that’s all.  He’s as glad as the rest of us to have you back.’ 

 

‘I’m so sorry, mom.’  Jensen whispered and there it was again; that flood of guilt, as if Jensen had _anything_ to be sorry for.  She nodded and kissed him lightly on the cheek.

 

‘Donna, I think I’m gonna take Jensen home, okay.  Let Alan get used to the fact that he’s back.’  Jared smiled slightly, trying to ease some of the tension in the room.

 

Donna nodded, even though she did look rather upset by the idea; Jared felt bad for making her feel that way after everything she’d been through but his mate was his priority and just being there was hurting Jensen.  ‘I’ll let Mack and Josh know that Jen’s home so, when he’s ready, he can come back round.  They’ll be so happy.’ 

 

She shifted, nervously, for a moment, ‘We didn’t tell them when you rang, Jared, just in case, you know…’  Donna left the rest unsaid but Jared understood the sentiment anyway.   Mack had been a wreck when Jensen had gone missing and she’d been the only member of the family to never give up on her brother.  To be honest, Josh hadn’t been much better but he’d taken a leaf out of Jared’s book and thrown himself into his work to try and get past the pain of losing his little brother. 

 

Once Donna was out of the room, Jared turned to Jensen, ‘Jen, you should tell them.  You should let them know that you didn’t stay away on purpose; that you didn’t know _how_ to find your way back.’  Jensen looked at him like he was mad.

 

‘Are you crazy, Jay?  I can’t tell them about…about… _that_.  I figured that you would’ve told them, after you found me, but since you haven’t then I’m not telling them.’  He shook his head vehemently.

 

‘Jen, you have to.’  Jared insisted; what on earth did Jensen think he’d done wrong?

 

‘No, Jared, I don’t.  At least this way they can just be angry at me for being a thoughtless bastard and not hate me for being…’

 

‘Being what?’  Jared asked, curious as to what was going through his mate’s mind; he just couldn’t get a clear read on Jensen right then, not with the jumble of emotions at war in the other man’s head.

 

‘I…I…Never mind.  But you…you _can’t_ tell them Jared, _please_.’  Jensen begged.  Jared was torn between respecting his mate’s wishes and stopping Jensen from doing something that would cause him harm.  He was Jensen’s Alpha; he was meant to take care of him, look out for him even when Jensen couldn’t see what was best for him.  And Jensen lying about what happened _wasn’t_ the best solution – Jared knew that. 

 

But Jared decided that he’d grant Jensen’s wish for now; Alan was still in shock, after all, and he needed some time to calm down and process that his son was finally home.  ‘Can we just go Jay?’  Jensen asked quietly but Jared heard the defeat, all too clearly, in the other man’s voice.  Jared didn’t say anything though; he’d wait till they got home to talk to his mate about this.  So he just nodded and led Jensen back to the car. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/35817.html#cutid1)

 

 


	17. Chapter Seventeen.

** Chapter Seventeen. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

‘I moved.  The place isn’t that far from our old apartment but it’s bigger and it’s got this really huge garden.’  Jared said as he stared out the car windscreen.  They were finally alone together for the first time since the alleyway in Chicago and Jared hadn’t even _tried_ to touch him.   Jensen was barely able to keep himself from climbing over the gear shift and into Jared’s lap.  The man’s smell was intoxicating; it was everything that Jensen been dreaming about for three years, only now it was stronger and had a lifetime of memories behind it. 

 

All that Jensen could think was that the kiss in the alley must have been a fluke, maybe caused by memories of emotions and heat that Jared obviously didn’t feel anymore, not for him anyway.  There weren’t words for how Jensen was feeling; knowing that he’d lost the love of his life right after he found him again, it was…it was just too much bear. 

 

They finally stopped in front of a large house; it was truly stunning and Jensen had to swallow down a gasp at the sight.  The house was two stories high, with a wooden façade, and beautiful grounds surrounding the front and back of the building.  It was everything that Jensen had always wanted.  The bitter irony wasn’t lost on Jensen; Jared now had the house that Jensen wanted but Jared wasn’t his anymore.  Seemingly oblivious to Jensen’s inner turmoil, Jared grabbed his hand and pulled him inside.

 

Once they were inside, Jared stopped Jensen’s curious wanderings with a short, ‘We need to talk.’  And when had a good conversation _ever_ started with those words?

 

Jensen nodded, despondently, perhaps it was better to get this over with - like ripping off a band aid, except this band aid was the only thing holding Jensen together and, without it, he was sure that he’d just fall apart. 

 

Once Jensen had sat down on the couch, Jared knelt in front of him, a concerned look on his face, and took both of Jensen’s hands in his. 

 

‘I’m sorry.’  Jensen blurted out; he hadn’t planned to say it, hadn’t wanted to remind Jared of what he’d done but he hadn’t been able to keep it in.  And once he’d started, Jensen just couldn’t stop.  ‘Jared, I’m so sorry.  I should have found a way back to you; I _knew_ that there was something wrong, but…but he said he was my husband, and I…I didn’t know anyone…or…or _anything_ else, I’m so sorry.  Please, _please,_ don’t hate me.’  He stopped only when Jared’s finger pressed lightly against his lips. 

 

‘Jensen, baby, is that what’s been bothering you?’  The taller man lifted his hand and brushed away a tear from Jensen’s cheek, ‘You honestly think I could ever hate you?’

 

Jensen sniffed and shrugged; he hated himself, it wouldn’t be too much of a stretch to think that Jared hated him too. 

 

Jared got up and sat down next to him on the couch.  He pulled Jensen into his arms, wrapping them tightly around the Beta’s body.  ‘I could _never_ hate you.  I love you.  I always have.’

 

‘So…so you haven’t…you and Sandy aren’t…’

 

Jared looked confused for a moment before his eyes widened in shock, ‘Of course not, Jen, why would you ever think that?’

 

Jensen shrugged again. 

 

‘Jen, you’re the only person I’ve ever wanted to be with, and even if…’  Jared paused for a second and Jensen felt a twinge of pain that he was fairly sure wasn’t his own, ‘If I’d never found you, there still never would’ve been anyone else.’  The words sent warmth coiling through Jensen’s body, thawing the frozen pieces of his heart.   He smiled slightly, daring to feel hope for the first time in…well, _years_.

 

‘And, Jensen, none of what happened was your fault.  Even werewolves can’t find their way home if they don’t know there’s a home to find.’  Jared brushed a hand through Jensen’s hair and Jensen saw something glitter on the man’s finger. 

 

Jensen’s breath hitched as he reached into the pocket of the pants he was wearing.  He pulled out the little leather pouch, ‘I…I had this…I didn’t know what it meant but I knew it meant something.  Even after J…Jeff told me to get rid of it, I just couldn’t so…so I kept it.’

 

Jared took the leather pouch from Jensen, looking a little puzzled, and upended the contents.  The bronze band fell into his palm.  ‘Oh Jen.’  He breathed out and gave Jensen a fond smile, ‘See you didn’t forget me, not completely.  And I was always thinking of you; every moment of every day.’  Jared slid the ring back onto Jensen’s finger and the small gesture meant so much that Jensen thought his heart might just explode. 

 

It was a promise that they were still alright, that Jared still loved him and still wanted him.  It was…it was everything. 

 

Jensen felt his all-consuming fear and dread melt away and suddenly he could sense Jared’s love for him, his relief that Jensen was alright and back home… _home._ Jensen leaned forward and kissed his mate, climbing into the man’s lap like he’d been wanting to do since Jared had found him in that wardrobe.  ‘Take me to bed, Jay.’  He whispered in his Alpha’s ear, blushing slightly even after all the years they’d been together and everything they’d done.

 

‘Of course, baby.’  Jared winked, ‘Have to christen the new bed, after all.’  Jensen laughed, a real laugh for the first time in what felt like forever, and clung on tight as Jared carried him up the stairs. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/35945.html#cutid1)

  
 


	18. Chapter Eighteen.

** Chapter Eighteen. **

 

** Jared. **

 

Jared laid his mate down on the crisp white sheets covering the bed; he hadn’t been in this room since he’d finished decorating it.  Jared had slept in the guest bedroom for the past couple of years, wanting to save this room, this _bed_ for him and his mate. 

 

Jared leaned down to press a soft kiss to Jensen’s lips.   ‘You have no idea how often I dreamed of this.’

 

‘I think I have some idea.’  Jensen replied and the slightly embarrassed look on the man’s face and the blush staining his cheeks told Jared that he wasn’t been the only one who’d imagined this moment. 

 

Jared pulled back slightly to look down at his mate, his perfect mate, who was finally back where he belonged - with Jared - it just didn’t seem real. 

 

Jensen was stunning.  He’d always been the most beautiful thing that Jared had even seen but Jared didn’t think his Beta had ever looked more beautiful than he did right then, staring up at Jared from their bed.  His green eyes were almost luminous in the dim light of their bedroom, framed by long, dark lashes that swept down over the man’s pale cheeks every time he blinked.  Jensen’s pupils were blown wide creating dark pools, in centre of his emerald eyes, that threatened to swallow Jared whole. 

 

Jensen blushed under the heat of Jared’s gaze and turned his face away, just like he always did when Jared gave in to the enormous temptation to stare at his gorgeous mate.  The shy action was so reminiscent of their time before that Jared couldn’t help but smile.  Jared butted his nose gently against Jensen’s cheek, bringing the Beta’s face back to his.  ‘God, I love you so much.  I can’t believe that I almost lost you.’  Jared whispered into Jensen’s ear, the thought making his heart clench painfully.

 

‘You never lost me.  Not really.  Even before I remembered who you were, who _I_ was _,_ I knew there was something missing.  I…I…can’t explain it but I never felt whole without you and every night, when I went to sleep, I dreamed about this other man,’  Jensen looked up at him, ‘I dreamed of you.’  Jensen barely got the softly spoken words out before Jared was kissing him.  A deep, passionate kiss that communicated everything that Jared didn’t have the words to say. 

 

Jensen brought his hands up and threaded his fingers through Jared’s.  Jared grasped the man’s hands tight in his own before pushing their linked fingers back against the pillow under Jensen’s head. 

 

Jensen moaned low into Jared’s mouth, his grip tightening on Jared’s fingers.   Jared kissed his lover for several long moments, drowning in the unique taste of his Beta that he’d never quite forgotten.  He finally unlaced their fingers to undo the buttons of Jensen’s shirt.  Jared pulled the shirt from Jensen’s body, dropping the garment to the floor, before removing Jensen’s pants and boxers and sending them to join the shirt. 

 

Miles of smooth ivory skin were revealed to him and Jared couldn’t resist leaning down and biting the man’s collarbone; leaving a dark red mark on the skin.  His mark.  It had been far too long since his Beta had worn his marks on his body.  Jensen gasped and rocked his body up into Jared’s with a soft,  ‘Jay.’

 

‘Mine.’  Jared whispered, running his tongue across the mark.

 

‘Yours.’  Jensen answered, his head tipping back against the pillow. 

 

Jared made quick work of his own clothes, letting them join Jensen’s at the side of their bed.  Jared moaned at the first touch of skin against skin; a dream could never compare to the very real feeling of his mate’s body under him.  He backed away a little and gently urged Jensen to turn onto his stomach.  Jensen looked up at him, a little dazed, but did as Jared directed.  Jared ran a hand down the sensuous curve of Jensen’s back to the rounded swell of his ass - the man’s back was truly a work of art.

     

Jared briefly pressed his lips to the top of Jensen’s spine before he proceeded to kiss and lick his way down the man’s body until he reached Jensen’s lower back.  Jared let his tongue dart out to lick across his mate’s dripping hole.  Jensen gasped and shifted beneath him and Jared stroked a soothing hand down his mate’s side.   Jared placed a large hand on each cheek of Jensen’s perfect ass and parted the white globes to reveal the Beta’s dusky pink hole.  Jared stabbed his tongue into his mate, licking his way inside, until Jensen was unconsciously pushing back against his face, gasping desperately at every swipe of Jared’s tongue. 

 

Jared pushed a long finger into Jensen’s wet hole alongside his tongue; Jensen opened up easily for him, his body’s natural slick easing the way.  Jared slid a second finger in, beside the first, before crooking the two digits inside his mate.  Jensen inhaled sharply and Jared smiled and stroked his fingers over the spot again.  ‘God, Jared.  Now, do it now.’  Jensen breathed out, pushing his body back onto Jared’s fingers.  ‘ _Please_.’

 

Normally, Jared probably would have tortured Jensen a little longer with his fingers but, after three years of waiting and nothing but dreams to slake his lust, he was almost as desperate as his mate.  Jared pulled out his fingers and flipped Jensen onto his back; he wanted to see Jensen’s face this first time.  He thrust his hard cock into his mate’s eager hole and, as soon as Jensen’s head fell back against the pillows, his eyes closed in ecstasy, Jared bit down hard on the Beta’s neck.

 

It was amazing.  Jared felt complete for the first time since Jensen had disappeared.  He stayed still for a moment, savouring the tight clutch of Jensen’s hot body around him, before drawing back and slamming back in.  Jensen grabbed Jared’s hands again, locking their fingers together.  Jensen caught his bottom lip between his teeth, obviously to keep from crying out, and screwed his eyes tightly shut at the pleasure storming through his body.  Jared thrust in again and Jensen all but bucked off the bed as Jared hit his prostate. 

 

Jared leaned down and pulled Jensen’s swollen bottom lip from between Jensen’s teeth as he set up a punishing pace, aiming for his Beta’s prostate on every thrust.  ‘Come on, baby, I want to hear you.’  Jensen had never been quiet before and Jared certainly didn’t want his mate quiet now.    

 

Jensen writhed and moaned loudly beneath him, pushing back into Jared’s thrusts, a light sheen of sweat breaking out over his skin.  That was more like it.  Jared knew that he wouldn’t last long, not after so long and not with his mate feeling so damn heavenly around him; all too soon, Jared felt his knot swelling and pulling at Jensen’s rim on every pass. 

 

Jensen whimpered every time Jared’s knot caught at the edge of his hole; he was clearly as desperate for a knotting as Jared was.  The moment Jared’s knot finally lodged inside, Jensen came explosively all over their stomachs and chests.

 

Jensen’s ass squeezed exquisitely around Jared’s knot, sending him over the edge after his mate, and he spilled into Jensen’s body.  They remained still for a moment, both breathing heavily, their hands still joined on either side of Jensen’s flushed face.  _Jesus_ , the man looked like a debauched angel and Jared had never felt so glad to be a sinner. 

 

Jared couldn’t resist dipping down and kissing those red, swollen lips and nipping along Jensen’s jaw to his ear before whispering, ‘You were made for me Jensen.  We were made for each other and no-one could ever come between us.  No-one.’  He bit lightly on Jensen’s ear lobe before kissing his mate softly on the cheek.  Jensen just nodded but his eyes looked suspiciously wet as he looked up at Jared. 

 

Jared smiled, unlinking their fingers and trailing a hand down Jensen’s cheek, reassuringly, before turning his mate on his side and spooning up behind him.  He wound a strong arm around his mate’s waist and pulled the man against his chest.  They’d be locked together for the next couple of hours and Jared couldn’t think of a better way to spend his afternoon…to spend the rest of his life actually. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/36162.html#cutid1)

 


	19. Chapter Nineteen.

** Chapter Nineteen. **

 

** Jared. **

 

It was surprising how easily their lives fell back into their old routine; the only thing that was different was that when Jared left for work, Jensen stayed at home.  They’d decided that he wouldn’t go back to his job at the high school until the next semester, giving Jensen some time to get used to being home before he went back to work. 

 

Jensen was doing pretty well, in general, but Jared still caught the Beta second guessing himself around the house from time to time.  It was little things, like Jensen taking too long over a decision that he wouldn’t have spared a second thought for in the past or the man stopping abruptly in the middle of a chore, shaking his head at himself and starting all over again from scratch.  And while his mate had always been a perfectionist, the behaviour was worrying; Jared just hoped that the longer Jensen was back and the more comfortable he became in their home, the better it would get. 

 

Jared couldn’t help but think it was a shame that the blow to Jensen’s head, in that alley, hadn’t managed to erase the three years that Jensen had spent with Morgan or the damage the man had done to his mate.

 

Jensen had talked a bit about it, just a few details here and there, but even the very little that Jared had heard almost had him storming off in search of Morgan, deal or no deal.  But he knew, deep down, that Jensen didn’t want that and Jared, himself, knew better than to draw attention to the pack but the things Morgan had done to his mate, the lies he’d told him – they made Jared shake with rage. 

 

He spent a lot of time down at the gym those first few weeks. 

 

The pack’s reaction had been mixed; their closest friends had, of course, accepted Jensen back with open arms even though none of them knew what Jensen had been through or what had kept him away.  Although Jared suspected that Tom, Mike, Steve and Misha had guessed more than they were letting on, maybe Chris had let something slip.  Jared had obviously told Chris the full story; he’d been Jensen’s best friend since the man had moved to the neighbourhood and he’d searched with Jared for years; the man had deserved to know the truth.  Jared was sure that Jensen would’ve agreed even if he hadn’t been able to tell Chris himself.  Jared didn’t know if their friends knew or not and since Jensen didn’t seem to have noticed anything, he was _more_ than happy for them to know.    

 

Some of their other friends, though, avoided Jensen like the plague.  Whenever they entered a room, Katie and Matt would leave; Jensen never failed to flinch every time it happened even though he tried to hide it.  Jared understood that they were hurting and that they believed Jensen had abandoned them for a human life but, even so, they’d been Jensen’s friends for years.  Jared was mad at them for shutting Jensen out, just when he needed them most. 

 

Cindy was the worst; she’d had a huge crush on Jensen since he’d first arrived in town and had been pretty upset when he’d chosen Jared as his mate.  Just after Jensen had gotten back, Cindy had walked right up to him, a scowl on her face, ‘Didn’t think we’d see you back here.  New life not all it was cracked up to be?’  Jensen hadn’t even been able to stutter out a response before she’d flicked her long, black hair over her shoulder and stormed out, quickly followed by Katie and Matt who’d thrown equally disdainful looks over their shoulders at his mate. 

 

Chris had barred them all from Kane’s that night despite Jensen telling him that it was fine, that he understood, and that it wasn’t their fault.  To hell it wasn’t!  Jared was pretty damn sure that Chris had been thinking the same thing given the sour look the man had thrown in Jensen’s direction at the time.  Even if Jensen _had_ left voluntarily, they all still should’ve known that he wouldn’t have done it to hurt them. 

 

Then there was the rest of the Pack; some of the wolves were good to Jensen, welcoming him home, whereas others made their disapproval of his ‘foray into the human world’ well known.  And then, of course, there were the ones who’d never liked Jensen all that much in the first place, the ones who’d spread the rumours about Jensen running off with another pack, another mate, even a human.  They threw cruel words at Jensen whenever the man came close, making no effort to lower their voices or hide what they really thought of Jared’s mate.  They whispered even crueller words behind his back, though, trying to poison Jensen’s reputation within the pack.  And, despite Jared’s best efforts, even those words made their way back to Jensen in the end.  

 

But Jensen - he just took it.  Every harsh word, every mean look.  He didn’t contradict the lies or the mistaken assumptions – he just let chip away at him, piece by piece, without a word of protest. 

 

Even when he and Jared actually _heard_ the bastards talking about Jensen; claiming that he wasn’t pack anymore and that he should never have been allowed back, Jensen still said nothing.  Jared was barely able to keep himself from ripping their lungs out but Jensen always just tried to calm him down with shaky smiles and uneasy laughs.  He told Jared, over and over, that it was okay even though Jared could feel the pain radiating from his mate at every hurtful word.

 

Jared had booked some hours down at the FBI shooting range too.

 

But three weeks after Jensen came back; it all came to a head.  Jared was sitting at the bar with Chris, waiting for his mate to join them, when Chris asked, ‘So why’d you let Morgan live?’  Jared had seen Chris’ shock when Jared had told him that he’d left the asshole alive; Jared was a little surprised that it had taken this long for his friend to ask him.

 

‘I didn’t want to.  The whole way there all I could think about was blowing the bastard’s brains out.’  Jared replied honestly, he wasn’t ashamed of that fact; Morgan had hurt Jensen in ways that Jared was only just beginning to uncover.   But when I got there, he just…he just dropped the knife.  He gave up - fucking surrendered.  I didn’t expect him to do that.  So I couldn’t shoot him.’ 

 

Jared sighed, looking down into his whisky, ‘I’m FBI, Chris, and Morgan’s not part of our world - he’s human­ - our laws don’t apply to him.  There would’ve been an investigation and I just couldn’t risk it…they might’ve put me away for shooting an unarmed man, Chris.’  He looked his friend right in the eye then, ‘I’ve spent too many years away from Jensen already, I wasn’t about to risk making it anymore.’  Chris just nodded, understanding written all over his face.

 

‘I get it, Jared, I do but what if Morgan comes back for…’

 

Chris was interrupted by a loud, familiar voice drifting over to them from the other side of the room.  Denise.

 

‘And he just comes _crawling_ back like nothing’s happened.  Like he didn’t just abandon the pack and his _mate_ for three years.  It’s a fucking joke.’  Jared clenched his jaw; he’d heard similar accusations thrown at his mate, over the past few weeks, but that didn’t make them any easier to handle. 

 

It was what came next, though, that really made Jared’s blood boil, ‘And poor Jared.  I bet that little Beta slut had a human out there; no mated Beta could go three years without some sort of contact.  He’s not good enough for the pack and he’s certainly not good enough for Jared.  Mitch should fucking banish him then, maybe, he’ll finally get the message that we don’t want him here and get the hell out of town.  It would be better for everyone.’  Jared was on his feet and across the room before he even realised that he was moving.

 

‘You’ve got no fucking idea what you’re talking about.’   Jared snarled at the Beta.

 

‘Oh.  Jared.’  Denise stood up, looking mildly surprised but also rather pleased to see him; apparently their disastrous date hadn’t been enough to show her that Jared wasn’t interested in her in any way shape or form.  ‘I know you _love_ him, he’s your mate after all.  But he doesn’t have to be, Jared; you don’t owe him anything, not after the way he treated you.  You can always find yourself a new Beta, a better one, one you deserve.’  She stroked her hand, suggestively, along his arm.

 

Jared let out a bitter laugh, ‘I owe him everything, he _is_ everything and, believe me, there is no-one better.’  He added harshly, hoping that she’d take the hint that she was even worthy to speak Jensen’s name let alone challenge him for Jared’s heart.

 

Denise snorted and it was a decidedly unbecoming sound, ‘After what he’s been doing out _there;_ slutting around behind your back Jared, letting other men claim him, probably even _humans_.’  She made a disgusted noise in the back of her throat; she was obviously one of the stupidly small-minded werewolves who had a problem with humans, ‘He’s disrespected you, Jared, thrown all your generosity back in your face, he…’

 

‘He was fucking kidnapped you stupid bitch!  He was taken away from me… from all of us, and _kept_ away.  It wasn’t his fault _or_ his choice so you need to shut your fucking mouth before I shut it for you.’  Jared roared. 

 

Silence fell over the bar; the only sound that Jared could hear was his own harsh breathing and the blood pounding in his ears.

 

Until…‘Jared?’ 

 

Oh god, _Jensen!_  What had he done? 

 

Jared turned around slowly to see his mate standing at the bar with Chris, his face ashen and his eyes wide as they stared into Jared’s; humiliation and betrayal shining in their emerald depths.  ‘You…you…how _could_ you?’  Jensen asked quietly, as if they were the only two people in the room.  

 

A loud cough brought Jensen crashing back to reality and his eyes flickered nervously over the room.  A deep flush rose to his cheeks before Jensen spun round and all but ran from the bar.

 

Jared made it outside just in time to see Jensen climb into a taxi, not even sparing Jared a backward glance as Jared called for him to stop. 

 

‘Shit!’  Jared ran to his car, cursing under his breath, and searched through his pockets for his keys.  As soon as he had them, Jared jammed them into the ignition and gunned the Impala home.  He had some serious grovelling to do.

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/36409.html#cutid1)


	20. Chapter Twenty.

** Chapter Twenty. **

 

** Jared. **

 

Jared winced as the bedroom door slammed behind Jensen and he sighed, deeply, before following the man upstairs.  Jared slowly opened the door and slipped inside.  Jensen was pacing, back and forth, across the room; Jared could feel the anger and shame flowing through his mate, drowning out everything else, ‘Jen, I’m so…’

 

‘Don’t.’  Jensen raised a hand in Jared’s direction, cutting off his apology.  ‘You _knew_ that I didn’t want anyone to know.  How could you do that?’  Jensen asked, his voice tight. 

 

‘Because they _had_ to know.’  Jared said simply; it was the truth – they’d played this Jensen’s way for weeks and all that had done was make things worse.  He hadn’t meant to tell everyone that night, it really had been an accident, but Jared wasn’t sorry that it had happened; he was just sorry that his mate was hurting. 

 

It was time for the pack to know what had happened to Jensen so that they’d stop blaming him for something that wasn’t his fault…then maybe Jensen could stop blaming himself too.

 

Jensen narrowed his eyes at Jared, ‘Why?  Because _you_ thought they should?  Because _you_ thought that I should’ve told them?’  Jensen walked up to him, looking Jared right in the eye, ‘I’ve had enough of people making decisions for me, Jared; I don’t need you to start doing it too.’

 

Jared felt his own anger flare up at that; was Jensen seriously comparing the mistake he’d just made to what Morgan had done? 

 

Jared clenched his jaw, feeling all the fear and rage he’d tried to bury from the last three years rise to the surface.  Suddenly, he was so mad at Jensen; mad at him for leaving, mad at him for thinking that any of this messed up situation was his fault, mad at him for not defending himself against the lies.  ‘You wanna know why I did it Jensen, huh?  Because I couldn’t bear to have them talk about you like that, I couldn’t _bear_ to just stand by and let them act like you betrayed us when it was _us_ who fucking failed _you_ , okay.’  Jared all but yelled at the shorter man.

 

‘That’s not a good enough reason for what you did, Jared.’  Jensen shot back, his green eyes blazing. 

 

Jared took a step forwards so that they were standing barely an inch apart; the move forced Jensen to look up at him, ‘Well then, maybe I did it ‘cause I love you and I’m mad that I couldn’t protect you!’  He glared down at Jensen, daring the other man to contradict him. 

 

‘Well…well…’  Jared could see Jensen’s nostrils flaring as the Beta took deep breaths to try and calm himself down.  Jared could still feel the ire and humiliation burning brightly in his mate but, suddenly, Jensen’s mouth was on his and his hands were threaded tightly in Jared’s hair. 

 

The kiss was hard, more teeth than lips, and Jared growled, giving in to his own rage.  He shoved Jensen, hard, into the bedroom wall and pushed a thigh between the Beta’s legs.  Jensen arched up, his head thumping back against the wall, and Jared leaned forwards and sank his teeth into the exposed length of Jensen’s neck. 

 

Jensen gasped and pushed Jared away, scowling at the taller man, even as he reached out to pull Jared back into another passionate kiss.  Jared growled into Jensen’s mouth and pushed his mate towards the bed; as soon as Jensen’s knees hit the edge of the mattress, Jared flipped the man so that he was lying on his stomach.  Jensen immediately made to get up, but Jared bent down and bit Jensen, warningly, on the back of the neck.  ‘Stay the hell down, Jensen.’

 

Had Jared’s brain not been so clouded by the odd mixture of anger and lust coursing through his body, he might’ve been worried about the memories that this scenario could’ve awakened in his mate.  But one whiff around the room and he could smell the arousal pouring off his mate; there was no fear, no uncertainty, in his mate’s scent.  Just want and frustration. 

 

Jared ripped off Jensen’s pants and shirt before grabbing both of Jensen’s hands and holding them above the man’s head, in one hand, whilst he removed his own clothes.  Jared climbed over Jensen’s body and settled down on his mate’s backside, letting Jensen feel his hard cock against his ass.

 

Jensen bucked up with a gasp as Jared rocked his body down into Jensen’s.  Jared felt the shudder that made its way down Jensen’s spine as he leaned down to nip at the side of the man’s neck.  Jared let go of Jensen’s hands; he needed both of his for what he had planned. 

 

Jensen immediately slipped a hand underneath himself, clearly going for his cock.  Jared slapped Jensen hard on the ass, ‘Put them back, Jensen; you don’t get to move them till I say.’  He punctuated the order by thrusting two fingers into his mate’s slick, open channel.  Jensen’s breath hitched and he instantly gripped the headboard, his fingers curling tightly around the metal curves. 

 

Jared worked his fingers into his mate’s dripping hole, for barely a moment, before spreading Jensen’s cheeks and ramming home. 

 

Jensen keened loudly, his back curving upwards, and Jared didn’t think ever he’d seen anything hotter in his life – and that was saying a lot considering the fact he lived with Jensen.  Jared grabbed Jensen’s hips and pulled them up, forcing the other man to let go of the headboard and put his hands underneath himself on the bed, so that he was on all fours. 

 

Jared pounded into Jensen’s ass; the only sounds filling the room were Jensen’s punched-out breaths as Jared nailed his prostate, Jared’s deep grunts, and the rhythmic slap of skin on skin.  Needing more contact with his mate, Jared sat back on the bed and pulled down Jensen into his lap, bringing his chest flush against Jensen’s back. 

 

Jensen’s legs were spread obscenely wide on either side of Jared’s as he sank down onto Jared’s cock.  He let out a sigh as his ass hit Jared’s thighs and Jensen let his head fall back onto Jared’s shoulder, his mouth open and panting. 

 

Jared nipped along Jensen’s pale neck before stopping and biting down on the man’s earlobe, ‘You’re mine, Jensen.   You’re _fucking_ mine and no-one gets to talk about you like that, you hear me.’  He lifted Jensen off his cock before dragging the Beta back down and thrusting up into him at the same time.  ‘Not even you.’ 

 

Jared manhandled Jensen up and down, several times, before his mate took over the rhythm and began fucking himself on Jared’s shaft. 

 

Just as Jared felt his knot begin to swell, he grabbed the Jensen’s hips, stilling the Beta completely.  Jensen struggled and writhed against him, trying to pull up again, ‘No.’  Jensen whined, deep in his throat, but stilled all the same.  ‘You understand, Jensen?  None of this was your fault.’  Jared thrust up into his mate, and felt his knot lodge in Jensen’s ass, ‘None of it.’  Jared wound his arms around his mate’s chest as he pulled Jensen back against him, ‘I love you, and _nothing_ will ever change that.’

 

Jensen breath stuttered and he came all over his chest.  The tight clench sent Jared over the edge and he emptied his load into his mate.  Jensen turned his face to nuzzle at Jared’s neck and jaw.

 

They sat there for a long time with Jared licking and nibbling his way down Jensen’s neck and his hands slowly exploring and caressing his mate’s body until Jensen was panting and coming again. 

 

Finally, Jared’s knot deflated enough for him to pull out and he dragged Jensen down into the bed, spooning up against his Beta’s back.  All his anger had drained away long ago, and Jared could feel that his mate’s was all but gone too.  There was still embarrassment burning hotly, in Jensen, but the anger had melted away.  Their connection was as strong as ever as Jared wrapped himself around his mate body.

 

‘Still mad at you.’  Jensen mumbled sleepily as he relaxed back into Jared’s embrace. 

 

‘Really?  ‘Cause that felt like some pretty awesome make-up sex to me.’  Jared teased, knowing that his mate was no longer mad at him.

 

‘Wasn’t make-up sex.’  Jensen replied lazily; the man always got drowsy after sex, ‘ _That_ was awesome angry, argument sex.  We’re gonna have some awesome _make-up_ sex later.’  He snuggled back into Jared’s chest.

 

A thrill of excitement shot through Jared’s body at that thought and he could feel himself hardening against his mate’s ass.

 

‘Later.’  Jensen said firmly, even as Jared’s hand made its way down Jensen’s body to his cock, coaxing it to hardness again. 

 

‘Hmmm.’  Jared murmured against Jensen’s neck as he continued to fondle his mate and, despite his half-hearted protests, Jensen was already pushing his ass back against Jared.

 

****

 

The make-up sex really _was_ awesome - it was so awesome that they had to do it twice. 

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/36821.html#cutid1)

 


	21. Chapter Twenty-One.

** Chapter Twenty-One. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jensen was sat in the park, waiting for Jared, as his thoughts wandered to the last couple of days.  It had been surprising, to say the least.  After Jared had finally convinced him to leave the house, instead of the disgust and scorn that Jensen was sure would be directed at him, he’d received kind, sympathetic looks from pretty much everyone he’d met.  Some even going so far as to reach out and squeeze his shoulder, supportively, before moving on. 

 

And while Jensen didn’t really feel like he deserved their compassion, it was so much better than the alternative; it was so much better than the reaction he’d expected to receive.  The pack was his family, every single one of them; the idea that they hated him would’ve been too much to bear.   

 

Tom, Steve, Mike and Misha had come round to the house, as soon as they’d heard the news, and were barely over the threshold before Jensen was caught up in a bone crushing hug by Tom.  Jensen was equal parts shocked and relieved by their kindness; never in his wildest dreams had he thought that his friends would be so forgiving after what he’d done.

 

Jensen hadn’t been able to work up the courage to go and see his parents, though, and since they hadn’t come round to his and Jared’s house either, Jensen got the message, loud and clear, as to how they felt about him now.  And it wasn’t good.

 

A shadow settled over Jensen, blocking out the sun and pulling Jensen from his troubled thoughts.  Jensen looked up, smiling at his mate. 

 

Only it wasn’t his mate…it was David.   

 

Jensen shifted uneasily on the bench, torn between standing his ground and walking away.  Jensen didn’t want to fight but David always seemed so intent on pushing his buttons and trying to get a rise out of him.  Thankfully, he hadn’t seen David since he’d gotten back, well, it seemed that his luck on that front had just run out.

 

‘Hey there, Jenny, mind if I join you.’  Jensen bristled at the nickname; for one of his friends it would’ve been a light-hearted jibe but from David, Jensen knew how it was meant.  David was one of the few Alphas in the pack who _genuinely_ thought that Betas were worth less than Alphas, that their only purpose was to cater to their Alphas needs…unsurprisingly he was unmated. 

 

‘Actually, I was just wai…’

 

‘Great.’  David sat down next to him, just a little too close; he was _always_ just a little too close.  ‘So, Jenny, I hear you found yourself a little fun whilst you were away.’

 

Jensen stopped breathing; it was the first time that anyone, other than Jared, had actually mentioned what had happened.  Jensen schooled his expression into something bland and disinterested; he wouldn’t give David the satisfaction of knowing that he’d made Jensen uncomfortable, ‘No, I had an accident and forg…’

 

‘Oh, _right_.  Of course.  You just _forgot_ all about us, all about being a werewolf, all about your… _mate.’_   Jensen stomach flopped over, the sarcasm in the man’s voice bringing his own guilt to the surface. 

 

‘Yes.’  Jensen said quietly, wishing his voice sounded stronger.

 

The man laughed and it was cruel and bitter.  ‘Come on Jenny, you don’t have to lie to me.  I know why you left; you went to find yourself another stud right?  Jared not enough for you anymore?’  David’s hand dropped heavily onto Jensen’s thigh.

 

‘No!  It wasn’t like that!  I didn’t _know_ , I didn’t _remember!_ ’  Jensen denied, vehemently, as he shot up from the bench.  The very idea that anyone thought that Jared wasn’t everything that Jensen needed tore at him; Jay was wonderful and perfect and Jensen’s whole world.

 

‘ _Sure_ it wasn’t, Jenny.’  David stood up and walked Jensen backwards into the wall.  It was dark and Jensen could only just make out the features on David’s face in the moonlight; the man looked hungry, ravenous - ready to eat Jensen whole.  He leaned in close and breathed into Jensen’s ear, ‘But, sweetheart, you really didn’t need to go running off to find yourself another Alpha.’  David moved in closer, pining Jensen to the wall, ‘Believe me, I would be _more_ than happy to help you out with that.’  He sniffed loudly at Jensen’s neck, ‘And, hell, if you wanna stay mated to that overgrown fucker, you can; I won’t tell if you won’t.’ 

 

Well that was it, enough was enough!  Jensen wasn’t a fighter, by any means, but _no-one_ got to imply that he’d cheat on his mate, that he’d ever keep anything secret from him.  He would never lie to Jared, _never_.  Jensen snarled, and pitched his head forwards, hitting David in the nose. 

 

The Alpha howled and stumbled backwards, giving Jensen time to move away from the wall and land a punch to the taller man’s jaw.  ‘Why can’t you take no for an answer, David?  It was a no in high school, it’s been a no every other time you _asked_ me.’ Jensen spat at him; David never _asked_ for anything, he just took what he felt was his as an Alpha.  ‘And I’m saying no right now.’ 

 

‘You little bitch, you broke my fucking nose.’  David snarled through the blood dripping down his face.

 

‘Well then, maybe, you’ll stop sticking it where it’s not fucking wanted.’  Jensen shot back.  He was caught off guard, however, as David rammed unexpectedly into side, knocking him to the floor.  Jensen struggled under the larger man’s bulk, trying to push him off.  They wrestled on the hard ground, the rocks digging, painfully, into Jensen’s back and scrapping at his exposed skin.  Jensen knew that he would lose in the end, David was stronger than he was, but there was no way that Jensen was just bending over for the Alpha. 

 

Snarling, Jensen scraped his nails down the other man’s cheek.  David roared, his eyes flashing yellow and his teeth elongating as he began to shift.  He leapt at Jensen, pinning him to the ground, and bit down on Jensen’s neck with his sharp lupine teeth.  Jensen cried out at the sharp pain before bringing his knee up into David’s crotch. 

 

David reared back and Jensen pulled his aching body off the ground, turned and ran.  But something caught his ankle, in his haste to get away, sending Jensen crashing back to the ground.  In an instant, David was on top of him again, holding his body down.  Jensen bucked and kicked but he couldn’t move the weight a second time; the man was just too damn heavy and Jensen was too tired from their earlier struggles.

 

Jensen turned his face away, in disgust, as David’s bruised hand stroked down his face, ‘Gonna enjoy this Jenny, waited so damn long for this.’  Jensen squeezed his eyes tightly shut, willing himself to drift away, like he’d done so many times over the last few years. 

 

But then the weight was gone and he was being pulled up into a broad chest.  Jensen breathed in - _Jared._ Jensen turned around, his eyes narrowed on the other Alpha wolf.

 

‘Leave.’  Jensen ordered, his tone flat.  His body ached but he stood up straight and looked David right in the eye, not backing down an inch.  The other man might think that Betas were weak but he was wrong; just because they’d rather avoid a fight didn’t mean they wouldn’t defend themselves if they had to. 

 

Jared growled behind him, and Jensen could feel the wrath surging through his Alpha’s veins.  He reached a hand behind him to place on Jared’s chest - he didn’t want a fight here, not now.  David would get his punishment when Jensen reported him to the Pack Alpha; David had been on thin ice for years, with his behaviour, and Jensen wouldn’t risk him acting like this with another Beta. 

 

Ignoring Jensen’s restraining hand, Jared moved towards the other Alpha. Jensen spun round, only then taking his eyes off David, to place his other hand on Jared’s chest, ‘No, Jay.  Leave him, he’s not worth it.’  And he wasn’t; Mitch would make sure that David got what he deserved but if Jared attacked the other Alpha then there was a chance that Jared would get into trouble too.

 

Jared looked between Jensen and David, fire blazing deep within his hazel eyes.  ‘I wanna fucking tear him apart.’  Jared hissed through gritted his teeth, his eyes fixed on David.  Jensen saw the taller man’s hands clench and unclench at his sides as he struggled to stay back and do as Jensen asked.

 

‘Yeah, I know, but you’re not going to.’  Jensen moved closer to Jared, his hands still on the other man’s chest and whispered, ‘Please Jay, stand down.’  He turned Jared’s face to his own, locking his eyes with his Alpha’s.  The fire slowly receded in Jared’s eyes as he looked down at Jensen.   ‘Please.’  Jensen said again.  Jared shoulders slumped a little and he wound an arm around Jensen’s waist, drawing him in closer to his body and further away from David.

 

Jared didn’t look up from Jensen’s face as he growled ‘Go.’  Jensen knew that it was difficult for his Alpha to let the man go but even if Jared didn’t get into trouble with their own Pack leader, there was chance that police from the human world might come to investigate the attack – as an FBI agent, Jared couldn’t afford that.

 

Jensen heard some hurried shuffling as David made his exit, running off with his tail, metaphorically, between his legs.  Jensen could understand that; Jared was pretty intimidating, not to him obviously, but he could only imagine what other wolves saw when they looked at Jared. 

 

Jared brought a large hand down to Jensen’s face, stroking over his cheekbone and Jensen leaned into the soft touch.  ‘I’m sorry I was late, work ran over.’

 

‘It’s okay.  I’m okay.’  Jensen took Jared’s hand in his and kissed the man’s palm.  He’d missed this so much over the last three years, the quiet intimacy that he shared with his mate; how was it possible to miss something that you didn’t even know existed?  But, without a doubt, Jensen had.  The only proof he needed of that fact was given every time that Jared touched him. 

 

Jared stared at him for a moment, his quick eyes assessing Jensen and probably taking in the scratches covering the Beta’s body before he nodded.  Jared leaned down and nudged his nose against Jensen’s cheek before kissing him tenderly on the side of the mouth.  ‘How about we go home?’

 

Jensen closed his eyes and nodded, not really listening to the question, just losing himself in Jared’s scent.

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/36901.html#cutid1)

 


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two.

** Chapter Twenty-Two. **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jensen was nervous; his parents had asked to come over.  This would be the first time that he’d be seeing them since his first night home and since they’d found out where he’d been all these years.  Whilst they’d never know the full story of his disappearance, only Jared knew that and, even then, there were still some things that Jensen wasn’t sure he’d ever be ready to talk about, they still knew about Jeff.  It wasn’t a huge leap to guess the reason why the man had kidnapped and kept Jensen. 

 

Jensen dreaded his father’s reaction; it was almost as bad as when he’d realised that he was a Beta and not an Alpha like his brother.  His dad had been fine with that, though; he’d treated Jensen the same as he had before and had loved him just as much as Josh and Mack.  But this was different; this wasn’t something out of his control, not really, no matter what Jared said. 

 

Jared sat next to him on the couch, a comforting presence at his side like always.  Jensen was sure that he would have bolted already had it not been for his Alpha. 

 

** Jared. **

 

Jared could feel the nerves rolling off Jensen and he placed a hand, reassuringly, on the other man’s thigh.

 

Jared wasn’t worried; he’d already been to see Alan to arrange the visit in the first place.

 

_Jared knocked on the door of the house that he’d spent almost as much time in as his own during his teenage years.  Donna opened the door,_

 

_‘Jared?’  She sounded surprised, for a moment, before her expression turned quickly to one of concern, ‘Jared, what is it?  Is it Jensen?  Is he okay?’  Donna asked frantically.  He couldn’t blame her; losing Jensen, the way they all had, had made them all a little paranoid when it came to the man._

 

_‘Jensen’s fine, Donna, really.’  Jared said, placing a soothing hand on her shoulder.  ‘I was wondering if I could come in for a minute?  Is Alan home?’_

 

_She nodded and moved aside to let him in._

 

 _‘Jared?_ ’ _Alan asked from his seat on the couch, ‘Is everything alright?’  The same concern that had been so obvious on Donna’s face was mirrored on Alan’s so Jared knew that the man still cared, regardless of the way he’d been acting._

 

_‘Everything’s fine.  Can I sit down?’  Alan nodded and Jared sat down in the chair next to the couch.  ‘Why haven’t you come to see Jensen yet?’  No need to beat around the bush; they all knew that he had to be there about Jensen, there would’ve been no other reason for him to come alone._

 

_‘I…I…’_

 

 _‘He thinks that you hate him, you know.  He thinks that you blame him for what happened.  And until he knows that you forgive him, he’s never going to be able to forgive himself.  So_ do _you blame him, Alan?’  Jared fixed the older Alpha with a cold stare._

 

 _Alan looked devastated  but he wasn’t Jared’s main concern, Jensen was, so he continued, ‘Because if you do, I’ll take him away.  I’ll take him away from here, away from you and the Pack and away from anyone who might make him think that he has anything to feel guilty for.  I love him and he’s all I need.  I can make a life for him anywhere.  It’s_ your _choice as to whether his life involves you or not from now on.’_

 

_‘No, of course we don’t.’  Donna answered quickly, taking a seat next to her husband and grabbing his hand.  ‘We don’t blame him at all.’_

 

_‘Alan?’  Jared knew that Donna could never blame Jensen for any of this; Alan was another matter, though._

 

_‘I don’t blame him, Jared.  I never did.’  Alan sighed heavily; he looked tired and far older than his years, ‘I was angry, before, when I thought that he’d abandoned us.  Seeing him again, it was such a shock and I just couldn’t help but remember how devastated his mother and my other kids had been when he disappeared that…that I said things that I didn’t mean.  Jared, you know me, I love Jensen.  I didn’t really blame him even before we knew…before we knew about that other man.’_

 

_‘Then why’ve you been avoiding him?  Everyone else has come to see him.  He thinks you’ve rejected him.  He loves you both so much; I can’t take watching him tear himself apart over you.’  Jared’s voice had lost some of its cold edge now that he knew that Jensen’s parents didn’t blame his Beta but he couldn’t help but feel angry for what they were putting his mate through._

 

 _‘How could I?  After everything I said that day?  After giving up.  We_ stopped _looking for him, Jared.’  Alan stood up and crossed over to the window, gripping the ledge tightly, ‘I thought he was dead and I just stopped looking whilst that…that bastard…’  He bowed his head and Jared could see the pain that the knowledge of Jensen’s kidnap caused the man._

 

_‘He doesn’t blame you either, Alan.  He doesn’t blame any of us; I don’t think the thought ever even crossed his mind.  God knows why, but he doesn’t. All Jensen sees is a father that turned him away and now won’t talk to him.  How else did you think he’d interpret that?’  Jared asked, it was harsh but he wasn’t there to pull his punches; either Alan manned up and came to see Jensen or Jared would take his mate away so none of this could hurt him anymore.  Jared had no doubts about it; if that was what Jensen needed then Jared would do it._

 

_Alan deflated and he looked smaller than Jared had ever seen him, ‘You’re right.  I know you’re right.’  He wiped a hand over his cheeks before turning around, obliterating any evidence of the tears they both knew he’d shed.  ‘What do you want us to do?’_

 

So Jared had told Jensen that Alan had phoned, whilst the man was out, and asked to visit.  Jared had desperately wanted to tell Jensen what his parents had told him; that they still loved him and didn’t blame him for anything, but Jared knew that the words would only be believed if they came from the pair themselves.  Jared had told his mate that very thing, countless times, only to receive a sad, disbelieving smile in return. 

 

There was a knock on the door and Jensen shot out of his seat.  He walked towards the door before hesitating and looking back, nervously, at Jared.  Jared stood up and went to let Jensen’s parents in, leaving Jensen standing in the living room, wringing his hands.  Jared smiled when he saw Alan and Donna standing on the doorstep; Alan looked about as nervous as his mate, although not quite wringing his hands just yet, the man _was_ rubbing his hand across the back of his neck, just like Jensen did when he was anxious. 

 

‘Come on in.’  Jared stepped aside and allowed the older wolves to enter.  He hung back with Donna as Alan walked into the living room.  For a moment, the two men simply stood staring at each other and Jensen looked so damn vulnerable that Jared was about two seconds away from marching in there and bundling the other man into the Impala and driving away. 

 

But then Alan was moving, striding up to Jensen and pulling him into a tight embrace.  Jensen let out a shocked gasp before burying his face in Alan’s neck and bringing his own arms up around his father’s back.  Jared and Donna let out matching sighs of relief at the sight.

 

Jared heard Jensen whisper in a suspiciously wet voice, ‘I’m so sorry, Dad.’ 

 

‘It’s okay, son, you’ve got nothing to be sorry for.  Absolutely nothing.’  Alan soothed, running his hand down Jensen’s back as the man cried into father’s shoulder, all his feelings of rejection finally draining out of him.

 

Jared smiled a little; now he hoped that they could make a start on getting Jensen to forgive himself.  It was a step in the right direction, at least.

 

[NEXT.](http://saltandburnboys.livejournal.com/37126.html#cutid1)

 


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three.

** Chapter Twenty-Three (FINAL CHAPTER!) **

 

** Jensen. **

 

Jensen couldn’t quite believe it as he stared down at the stick in his hand but it was the third test that he’d taken and they’d all yielded the same result.  So it had to be right…he was pregnant. 

 

Jensen couldn’t keep the smile off his face; he’d always wanted pups and the thought of carrying Jared’s pups was just…just incredible.  At the thought of Jared, though, a twinge of doubt ran through Jensen’s mind; he knew that Jared had wanted pups with him before he’d left but would he still want them with Jensen now?  After everything?  Was Jensen good enough to carry Jared’s children now?  Would Jared want something so permanent tying him to Jensen forever? 

 

They hadn’t talked about kids since Jensen had gotten back; they’d had so many other things to talk about and catch up on and, to Jensen, the idea of him getting pregnant had seemed so far off in the future.  But now it was here and Jensen wasn’t sure how Jared would feel about it.

 

Jensen was doing better but there were still times when his guilt and insecurities threatened to overwhelm him.  And this…this was so huge; he just didn’t want to disappoint Jared again – he already had so much to make up for, he really couldn’t afford to mess up again. 

 

Jensen dropped the stick in the bin and walked out of the bathroom, still lost in his own thoughts.  Jared was out for the night with Chad and Sandy; the three of them hadn’t gone out together since Jensen had come home and he’d insisted that Jared go.  Secretly, he’d wanted to be alone when he took the pregnancy tests, not sure how he’d handle either outcome. 

 

Jensen wandered into the kitchen and put on the kettle to make himself some hot chocolate.  He needed to calm down and think of the best way to break the news to Jared and hot chocolate always made him feel better; that was what he needed right then.  As Jensen stood at the counter, he let his hand drift down to rest on his flat stomach, imagining the little life growing inside him – even with all his fears and doubts, the feeling was amazing and he already loved his baby. 

 

Jensen turned back to the kettle, one hand still resting on his stomach, and reached up to the cupboard to grab his favourite mug.  He froze when he felt something press against his back.  One quick sniff and he knew that it wasn’t Jared but the scent _was_ familiar and Jensen closed his eyes – no, it couldn’t be.  This was a dream…just a dream.  He must’ve fallen asleep and…and…

 

‘Hey there, sweetheart.  Pleased to see me?’  Jeff whispered in his ear.  As much as Jensen tried to convince himself that this was all some terrible nightmare, the gun pressed against his back felt very real.  ‘What, no hug?  I’m hurt, babe.’  The man mocked.  ‘Now, turn around…slowly; I really wouldn’t want to have to shoot you.’  Jensen snarled and whirled round, ready to take Jeff down even if it meant that he went down himself – at least, that way, Jeff would never be able to hurt Jared.  But when Jensen felt the cold metal of the gun against his stomach, he stilled instantly. 

 

He’d forgotten, for just a moment…it wasn’t only him that Jeff was aiming that gun at; that gun was aimed at something _so_ much more important than him. 

 

Jensen’s hand dropped protectively to his stomach, before he could stop himself, and Jeff’s eyes followed the movement.  The man’s mouth fell open in shock before his eyes narrowed on Jensen.  ‘You’ve got to be fucking kidding me?  You’re pregnant?’  Jeff jabbed the gun into Jensen’s side, ‘Three years with me and nothing but two months back with that…that yeti and you’re already knocked up?!’  Jeff shouted, his face turning an unattractive red.  He ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath, obviously trying to calm himself down.  ‘Doesn’t matter.  I can get _that_ taken care of when we get home.  If you come with me, quietly, maybe I won’t even kill it.’

 

‘NO!’  Jensen yelled.  There was no way that he was going anywhere with Jeff, especially not when the man knew about his baby. 

 

The gun prodded Jensen in the stomach again, ‘Well, if you don’t, then I’ll kill the little shit right now and take you with me anyway.’  Jeff hissed, ‘’Cause believe me, Jensen, I’m not leaving here without you.’

 

‘Then I guess you’re not leaving.’  That was all the warning that Jeff got before Jared fired his gun and the man fell to the ground, his own weapon clattering across the floor. 

 

Jared ran over to Jensen’s side just as he slid down the side of the counter, his hands cradling his stomach.  He could still feel the phantom pressure of the gun in his side; if Jared hadn’t come home…if…

 

‘It’s alright, baby.  You’re okay.  He’s gone and he’s never gonna hurt you again.’  Jared pulled Jensen into his arms, rocking him slightly as Jensen buried his face in the taller man’s neck. 

 

A few long minutes later and Jensen realised that Jared hadn’t said anything about the baby; surely he _must_ have heard Jeff talking about it.  Did that mean that Jared didn’t want it?  Jensen really hoped not but Jared’s lack of acknowledgement wasn’t a good sign.

 

Jared pulled away and looked down at him, a worried look on his face.  ‘What’s the matter, Jen?’  Jared cupped Jensen’s face in his large palm, stroking a thumb over Jensen’s cheekbone.

 

‘I…I…don’t you want it?’  Jensen blurted out, unable to stop himself, tears welling in his eyes. 

 

‘What?’  Jared asked, looking a little confused.

 

‘The baby?  I…I’m sorry.  I know we…we haven’t talked about it but…but I only found out a couple of hours ago.   I…I can leave…take the baby with me if you don’t want it…’

 

‘Whoa!  Slow down Jen.  What are you talking about?’  Jared looked even more confused than before.

 

‘I’m pregnant.  Didn’t…didn’t you hear Jeff?’  Jensen asked, his voice pitched low.

 

Jared’s fell silent, staring hard at Jensen; the moment lasted long enough to make Jensen squirm under the intense gaze.  Then Jared surged forwards and kissed him.  ‘Oh my God!  You’re pregnant?’

 

Jensen nodded, a little taken aback by Jared’s response – that was good right?

 

Jared grinned and kissed him again.  ‘This is amazing.  This is so fucking amazing!’  Jared laid a hand on Jensen’s stomach and looked Jensen in the eye, ‘ _You_ are amazing, Jensen.  How did I ever get so lucky?’  Jensen huffed out an incredulous laugh; he asked himself that very question every single day.

 

‘Pretty sure I’m the lucky one in all this.’  Jensen said softly, laying his hand over Jared’s.

 

‘Well clearly your pregnancy hormones are already affecting you ‘cause that’s just crazy talk.’  Jared beamed at him before his face turned serious again, ‘You have no idea how much I love you, do you?’

 

Jensen didn’t quite know what to say to that so he stayed silent as Jared continued, ‘Doesn’t matter, though, ‘cause I’m going to spend the rest of my life making sure that you know just how special you are.’

 

Jensen felt tears spring to his eyes again; he’d totally blame the pregnancy hormones for that - that must have been what it was.  ‘So you…you want this right?’  Jensen asked again, just to be sure, even though he was pretty certain of the answer now.

 

‘More than anything in the entire world, baby.  God this is so perfect.’  Jared pulled back slightly but left his large hand splayed on Jensen’s stomach, ‘You, me and our baby.’ 

 

And it _was_ perfect; it might’ve been a long, hard road getting there but they’d finally made it and Jensen had never happier. 

 

THE END. 

 

Thanks so much to everyone for reading!!

 

xxxx

 

 


End file.
